"Now you spend an extra hour in front of the mirror every morning and every night. And now you'll be the one to walk into a room and scan it for who looks better than you and who doesn't. And as the years go by, the numbers change. One day you'll walk into a room and you're the last woman any man notices."

"Mother, the only thing you ever taught me about the Sabbath is that Bergdorf's wouldn't be as crowded."

"Pierce Brosnan - Alex"

"Barbra Streisand - Rose Morgan"

"I want to be upfront with you. I am not interested in sex."

"I don't care if you're pretty, I love you anyway!"

"I love it if someone knew me. Really knew me. What I like, what I'm afraid of. What kind of toothpaste I use. I think that will be wonderful."

"The mathematical world is completely rational, uncomplicated by sex."

"To tell you the truth, I think your theories about relationships are total bullshit."

"You are the mother of the bride, not the opening act."

"I believe in love and lust and sex and romance. I don’t want everything to add up to some perfect equation. I want mess and chaos. I want someone to go crazy out of his mind for me. I want to feel passion and heat and sweat and madness. I want Valentines and Cupids and all the rest of that crap. I want it all."

"When my date takes me home and kisses me good night, if I don't hear the philharmonic in my head, I dump him."

"What, what? Yes, I have breasts. They cannot, however, be the subject of one of your papers."

"It's not a date. We're just agreeing to eat at the same table."

"By the way, would telling you now that I want sex tonight be enough of a warning?"

"Let's face it. They're not standing in line for me."

"Kevin Dunn - Mark Nash"

"Penélope Cruz - María Elena"

"Chris Messina - Doug"

"Patricia Clarkson - Judy Nash"

"Vicky returned home to have her grand wedding to Doug. To the house they finally planned to settle in. And to lead the life she envisioned for herself, before that summer in Barcelona. Cristina continued searching... certain only, of what she didn't want."

"Rebecca Hall - Vicky"

"Vicky and Cristina decided to spend the summer in Barcelona. Vicky was completing her master's in Catalan Identity, which she had become interested in through her great affection for the architecture of Gaudí. Cristina, who spent the last six months writing, directing, and acting in a 12-minute film which she then hated, had just broken up with yet another boyfriend and longed for a change of scenery. Everything fell into place when a distant relative of Vicky's family who lived in Barcelona offered to put both girls up for July and August. The two best friends had been close since college and shared the same tastes and opinions on most matters, yet when it came to the subject of love, it would be hard to find two more dissimilar viewpoints. Vicky had no tolerance for pain and no lust for combat. She was grounded and realistic. Her requirements in a man were seriousness and stability. She had become engaged to Doug because he was decent and successful and understood the beauty of commitment...Cristina, on the other hand, expected something very different out of love. She had reluctantly accepted suffering as an inevitable component of deep passion, and was resigned to putting her feelings at risk. If you asked her what it was she was gambling her emotions on to win, she would not have been able to say. She knew what she didn't want, however, and that was exactly what Vicky valued above all else."

"Scarlett Johansson - Cristina"

"Javier Bardem - Juan Antonio Gonzalo"

"I just have to come face to face with the fact that I’m not gifted. I can appreciate art and I like music, but it’s sad, really because I feel like I have a lot to express, and I’m not gifted."

"Maria Elena used to say that only unfulfilled love can be romantic."

"We are meant for each other and not meant for each other. It's a contradiction."

"Life is short. Life is dull. Life is full of pain. And this is a chance for something special."

"I'll go to your room, but you'll have to seduce me."

"If you don't start undressing me soon this is going to turn into a panel discussion."

"Lew Temple - Cal"

"Adrienne Shelly - Dawn"

"Eddie Jemison - Ogie"

"Jeremy Sisto - Earl Hunterson"

"Andy Griffith - Old Joe (final film role)"

"I love living vicariously through the pain and suffering of others."

"Keri Russell - Jenna Hunterson"

"[to Dawn] If I had a penny for everything I love about you, I would have many pennies."