"Shrek: Well Charming, you wanted me? Here I am, but let Arthur go. You don't need him for anything. After all, he's not king material. The kid is useless."

"Fiona: Leave him alone!"

"The Narrator: And so the brave Arthur helped Shrek take back to the castle and proudly took on his new role as king. King Arthur convinced the villains of Far Far Away to right their evil ways. Shrek, Fiona, and the gang returned to their home in the swamp. And it was a Happily Ever After, after all."

"Michael Gough as Shrek, Announcer."

"Mark Moseley as Donkey, Stage Hand, Bandit #3."

"Holly Fields as Fiona, Witch #3, Ogre Baby."

"Erin Mathews as Sleeping Beauty, Witch #4, Dronkey."

"Natalie Lander as Lady of the Lake, Witch #2, Ogre Baby."

"Jim Meskimen as Captain Hook, Attendant #2, Geek."

"Shrek: Charming! I've been saving a special beating just for you!"

"Phil LaMarr as Lancelot, Peasant #2, Attendant #1."

"Amanda Troop as Cinderella, Dronkey, Ogre Baby."

"Roger Rose as Peasant #1, Bandit #1, Pirate #3."

"Fiona: Oh no!"

"Prince Charming: Guards! Chain this monstrosity up!"

"Artie: You get off the stage, Charming. I'm king now."

"Donkey: Oh, oh! It's the after party, Shrek. Come on. Now's our chance Everyone's gonna be here. And there's gonna be peanuts, ice cream, man sandwiches, and bananas. And parfaits. You know how I love parfaits. And now that Artie's the king and we've got our happily ever afters back and all, I figure, you know, we can get some kind of royal decree like uh, a lifetime supply of chocolate syrup or those little cherries, something like that. Maybe we could just get you some soap, because you know offense but you do get kind of ripe sometimes."

"Shrek: Yep, you're the one and only, er, man for the job!"

"Prince Charming: Careful, big boy! One move and your friends get it!"

"Shrek: What do you want from me, Charming?"

"Prince Charming: It's simple -- you have a big part in my production. You see, your end is my beginning. Well, actually my ending. Of the play. Oh, never mind."

"Prince Charming: Listen to the crowd, Shrek! Do you hear what I hear? I hear thousands of people crying out for a hero! A new king!"

"Shrek: Oh they'll get a new king alright."

"Artie: This is so lame, Charming. I can guarantee not a single teenager would be caught dead watching this WEAK production. You're missing a huge demographic."

"Prince Charming: What are you talking about?"

"Prince Charming: Guards! Get the boy and chain him up!"

"Prince Charming: Extras! Stage right! Get him! Lightning crew! Capture that boy! Cyclops! That's your cue!"

"Prince Charming: No! You know what they say. It's not over until the fat ogre sings!"

"Artie: Um, I'm not an expert on the theatre, but I'm pretty sure they don't say that."

"Prince charming: Go get your own kingdom! Play to the crowd!"

"Shrek: Alright! Excellent! Take a bow, Charming. Show's over."

"Shrek: Not just yet..."

"Crowd: (Cheers)"

"Shrek: Okay, Donkey, here's a royal decree. Shut it."

"Donkey: Hey, hey. It's fine by me. You wanna keep on being Sir Stinky all the time. I was thinking about the rest of us. You know kinda like a public service."

"Shrek: King? Me? You must be joking."

"King Harold: Hmm, you've got a point. There is another heir to the throne... your cousin, Arthur."

"Donkey: He went that way."

"Shrek: Don't move. I'll go get him."

"Private: That, my friend, is top secret information. But I will tell you this... if you see a fairy, pick it up. They have magical powers that will help you on your quest. - Over and out."

"Puss in Boots: A cave. I should reach Shrek in no time. Shrek, there you are. Donkey and Arthur are waiting for us."