First Quote Added
April 10, 2026
Latest Quote Added
"Miles Jupp: "If you liked it, you should have put herring on it.""
"Graeme Garden: "Pop Go the Measles.""
"Barry Cryer: "Supercalifragilisticexpy-Halitosis.""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Twist and Gout.""
"Kerry Godliman: "Itchycrotch Park.""
"Barry Cryer: "Talkin 'bout My Constipation.""
"Graeme Garden: "If You're Happy and You Know It, Clap.""
"Kerry Godliman: "Girls on Phlegm.""
"Barry Cryer: "I've Got Spew Under My Chin.""
"Graeme Garden: "STD, all my troubles seem so far away...""
"Kerry Godliman: "My Mild Shakes bring all the boys to the yard.""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Don't Cha wish your girlfriend had spots like me.""
"Kerry Godliman: "The Girl from Emphysema.""
"Graeme Garden: "Cystitis Doin' It for Themselves""
"Barry Cryer: "I Just Called To Say I Have Herpes.""
"Kerry Godliman: "Rubella, Don't Take Your Love to Town.""
"Graeme Garden: "How Deep is Your Glove?""
"Kerry Godliman: "There's a Kind of Thrush all over the world...""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, here I am stuck in't Middlesbrough with you.""
"Marcus Brigstocke: "All the Dingle ladies, all the Dingle ladies...""
"Tony Hawks: "Ey-uptown Girl""
"Rachel Parris: "Ain't no sunshine...""
"Tony Hawks: "No Woman, No Pie""
"Marcus Brigstocke: "Baby It's Coal Outside""
"Rachel Parris: "Whitby, Baby One More Time""
"Marcus Brigstocke: "Of course the lovely Chris de Burgh's Gravy in Bed.""
"Tony Hawks: "Whippet Up and start again""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "I Guess That's Why They Call It the Ouse""
"Marcus Brigstocke: "Ooh baby, do you know what that's worth? Ooh Hebden is a place near Thirsk.""
"Gary Delaney: "Message in a Bootle""
"Pippa Evans: "Stuck in the Lidl in Crewe""
"Tony Hawks: "When I'm Cleaning Widnes""
"Barry Cryer: "I can make a patient without disturbing the bed.""
"Graeme Garden: "Stop The World, I Want To Throw Up""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Flagon""
"Barry Cryer: "Born On The Froth Of July""
"Graeme Garden: "Invasion of the Boddington Snatchers""
"Barry Cryer: "...starring Tipple""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Piddler On The Roof...""
"Graeme Garden: "Grolsch Encounters Of The Third Kind""
"David Mitchell: "A Staropramen Is Born""
"Jeremy Hardy: "Herbie Needs Extensive Welding Because Of Rust On The Underside""
"Jeremy Hardy: "Herbie Fails His M.O.T.""
"Jeremy Hardy: "Herbie Goes For His Annual Service""
"Jeremy Hardy: "The Daewoo After Tomorrow" (Barry: Where's your gong, Jack, for God's sake!?)"
"Jeremy Hardy: "A Daewoo In The Death Of Joe Egg" (Barry: Oh, shut up!)"
"Jeremy Hardy: "The Daewoo The Earth Stood Still""
"Jeremy Hardy: "A Daewoo At The Races""
"Jo Brand: "Mrs. Backfire""
"Jeremy Hardy: "Daewoo Of The Jackal""