"One mischievous monarch! Two terrifying pitfalls! And a billion ways to go mad! You'll find it all behind that door! Deranging! Rearranging! It's King Boo's Haunted Hideaway!"

"So spend away, competitors! Shell out coins for rides and Candy to make the run again and again!"

"But this was the STAR Battle! And I see only one Superstar! Me! So thar rod? Mine!"

"Better cough it up. Right now!"

"Treasure on the far isle! Pirates on the prowl! Blasting cannons! It's time to run the gauntlet in Goomba's Booty Boardwalk!"

"If you can somehow beat all of my loyal slave, I'll give you the Star Rod! Impossible, I know!"

"Welcome to the Star carnival!"

"What's our main attraction? You, of course! Get ready to party like never before! We've got it all! Minigames to make you move! Boards that make your party groove! So come one and come all! What fun we'll have! Clashes! Crashes! Brawls! Falls! Who am I, you ask? I'm your master of catastrophe, MC Ballyhoo, at your service! And, of course, I don't run this show solo. Two heads are better than one. Meet my friend - Big Top."

"Who's at the wheel?! How long is this train?! Are you ahead... or behind?! Welcome aboard the Perplex Express! Where are we going? Insane! And at the speed of crazy!"

"Crueler than pirates! Scarier than ghosts! Riskier than a runaway train! In Koopa's Tycoon Town you'll play an unbelievably dangerous game! Real estate - dominate the town!"

"Let's see who goes first! Smack the Dice Block! Punch with your Wii Remote!"

"Now it's time to start this party! Let the games begin!"

"Now witness a legendary jungle contraption: the DK Barrel Cannon!""

"If you pay 5 coins, it'll blast you across the board! Where exactly? Who knows?!"

"Head to the nearest Candy Shop and load up on the sweet stuff! What's all the hubbub about Candy?"

"You can gulp a piece at the start of your turn to mess with competitors! And to change your fate!"

"News flash!!! Incoming! Bonus Stars! Three kinds on the way!!!"

"Weeeee! I'm feeling light-headed! Everyone! Hustle for bonus coins!"

"Ahem!! Something! Caught in throat! Hack! Hack! It's..."

"You can trade Carnival Cards for the fun items at the Fun Bazaar!"

"The player who bashes out the highest number wins! 'Nuff said! Hit those blocks!"

"Hello! Hola! Aloha! Ahoy!"

"New fight! New stage! We're going to the ocean! Splashy! Smashy!"

"Bad guys should stick together? Stick this, Wario/Waluigi! I’m moving the Star!"

"You may have chased Stars earlier! But these Bonus Stars come to you! Each count towards your Star total!"

"Welcome to the finale! Hope that you all had a blast!"

"I'm delighted to see that you all made it here in one piece!"

"What kind of Bonus Star will be the first to appear?"

"And now we finally name the winner!"

"I'll plop coin bags onto red spaces and 1 coin onto all other spaces!"

"Well said, hat! Whadda bud, always covering me! Yes! Let's get to those results!"

"Yes, we can't name the winner yet! We need to find out who gets Bonus Stars!"

"Spit it out! Whoa, I getcha! It's a tie! Equal Stars and coins!"

"Well then, there's only one solution! Bring on the Dice Blocks!"

"Okay! One more time! And the ultimate victor is... (player)! What a triumph!!"

"Hope you had fun! Here, take (number) Carnival Cards!"

"Oooh! Sparkly! So bright! The first Star! Get there with 20 coins!"

"Calling all winners! Calling all losers! We've got a shake up coming!"

"My ears! Hurty-hurt! Too much talk! Not enough results!"

"Now let's give you all a run for your money!"