"Supposedly Cousteau and his cronies invented the idea of putting walkie-talkies into the helmet. But we made ours with a special rabbit ear on the top so we could pipe in some music."

"Son of a bitch, I'm sick of these dolphins."

"[to Ogata and Pele] What are you doing? Go to bed, you sons of bitches!"

"You really think it's cool for you to hit the sauce with a bun in the oven?"

"Nobody knows what's going to happen. And then we film it. That's the whole concept."

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go on an overnight drunk, and in 10 days I'm going to set out to find the shark that ate my friend and destroy it. Anyone who wants to join me is more than welcome."

"I'm going to find it and I'm going to destroy it. I don't know how yet, maybe dynamite."

"Does this seem fake? [points gun at jane]"

"[while giving Danielle a crumpled paper] I just want you to know that I know who you really are, and you're better than this. [Danielle uncrumples the paper and it is the drawing she made of the girl with lipstick at the table with Matthew]"

"Amanda Swisten — April"

"Sung Hi Lee — Ferrari"

"Nicholas Downs — Bob"

"Donna Bullock — Mrs. Kidman"

"Timothy Bottoms — Mr. Kidman"

"Paul Dano — Klitz"

"Chris Marquette — Eli"

"James Remar — Hugo Posh"

"Timothy Olyphant — Kelly"

"Elisha Cuthbert — Danielle/Athena"

"Emile Hirsch — Matthew Kidman"

"Matt never saw her coming... but all his friends had!"

"April: [to Klitz] I know this isn't professional, but I think you're really cute."

"Hugo Posh's Parrot: ' Cradle the balls!"

"[Upon observing the cheerleaders and football players] Man, there is some talent here. You get those girls together with those assbags right there and shoot 'em humping at, like, a football game or at a prom, that video would sell - Fuck, I'm good! How do I get these ideas? It's like a gift, you know? It's like I can't control it."

"You wanna be president? Lemme tell you the first rule of politics; Always know if the juice is worth the squeeze. You know what that means? It means you don't steal my girl unless you're ready to accept the consequences."

"[When some high school girls like the idea that Kelly has weed] Hey, you know who's got the killer bud? [hits Klitz] This fucker right here. [Kelly gives Klitz a Ziplock bag filled with Marijuana and suddenly the girls are interested in him]"

"I just gotta fuck something."

"God, I just wanna bang hot chicks!"

"Fine! Goddammit Matt! I swear to God if you don't fuck her, I'll kill myself! Matt! Please! Please! Matt! FUCK HER FOR ME! FOR ME!"

"Hi, I'm all wet. Can I come in?"

"Just go with it."

"[repeated line] What's the craziest thing you've done lately?"

"Matthew Kidman. I will always remember... The three legs of the tripod. My business partner. My student advisor. The next Einstein. Eli's calling card. Klitz's big debut. My own scholarship to Georgetown. And of course, I'll never forget the girl next door. As for me, I'm just going with it."

"Moral fiber. So, what is moral fiber? It's funny, I used to think it was always telling the truth, doing good deeds, basically [mumbling] being a fucking boy scout. But lately I've been seeing it differently. Now I think moral fiber's about finding that one thing you really care about. That one special thing that means more to you than anything else in the world. And when you find her, you fight for her. You risk it all, you put her in front of everything, your future, your life, all of it. And maybe the stuff you do to help her isn't so clean. You know what? It doesn't matter. Because in your heart you know, that the juice is worth the squeeze. That's what moral fiber's all about."

"[after Kelly gives him ectasy] Oh my God, am I gonna die?!?"

"For two sisters from a family of witches, falling in love is the trickiest spell of all."

"Lora Anne Criswell — Young Gillian"

"Camilla Belle — Young Sally"

"Aidan Quinn — Gary Hallett"

"Goran Visnjic — Jimmy Angelov"