peanuts-comic-strip

"(After Peppermint Patty asks him if he likes Marcie and her) I'm sorry... I'm not here anymore.. I've suddenly become a recording! (01 Jan 85)"

"on why he doesn't chase rabbits: Some of us are born dogs, and some of us are born rabbits. When the chips are down, I'll have to admit that my sympathy lies with the rabbits. (18 Apr 61)"

"Snoopy asked the "Stupid Cat Next Door" to help remove a splinter from his paw: Well that's one way of doing it - he removed me from the splinter! (19 Sep 81)"

"This is called the loser's walk. It's the way you're supposed to walk when you've lost again. (23 July 95)"

"Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. *sigh!* There's so little hope for advancement. (15 Feb 58)"

"(to The Cat Next Door) Hey, stupid cat!"

"To me, the ugliest sight in the world is an empty dog dish! (27 Feb 62)"

"as "World-Famous Astronaut": I did it! I'm the first beagle on the moon! I beat the Russians...I beat everybody...I even beat that stupid cat who lives next door! (14 Mar 69)"

"arm-wrestling Lucy: Succumb, you dark-haired fiend! (14 Feb 67)"

"on Molly Volley: I've had distemper, and I've played mixed doubles...I'd rather have distemper. (28 May 77)"

"Here's Joe Cool hanging around the student union eyeing chicks. Lucy storms past. Actually, we Joe Cools are scared to death of chicks... (28 May 71)"

"I remember last year about this time... it was two o'clock in the morning, and I was sound asleep... Suddenly, out of nowhere, this crazy guy with a sled appears right on my roof. He was okay, but those stupid reindeer kept stepping on my stomach! (23 Dec 66)"

"Curse you, Red Baron!"

"Curses, foiled again!"

"after a trip to the vet: They tortured me, but all I gave them was my name, rank and serial number! (19 Aug 66)"

""A Love Story" by Erich Beagle: "I love you," she said, and together they laughed. Then one day she said, "I hate you," and they cried. But not together. "What happened to the love that we said would never die?" she asked. "It died," he said. The first time he saw her she was playing tennis. The last time he saw her she was playing tennis. "Ours was a Love set," he said, "but we double faulted." "You always talked a better game than you played," she said. (27 May 73)"

"Though her husband often went on business trips, she hated to be left alone. I've solved our problem," he said. "I've bought you a St. Bernard. Its name is Great Reluctance. Now, when I go away, you shall know that I am leaving you with Great Reluctance!" She hit him with a waffle iron. (6 Aug 73)"

"Why Dogs Are Superior to Cats: They just are, and that's all there is to it! (5 Jan 74)"

"Her love affair had ended. She didn't want to live. She threw herself in front of a Zamboni. (27 Jun 91)"

"(After Lucy tells him to write about something positive for a change:) It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly, a kiss rang out! (19 Nov 81)"

"(After Lucy tells him to write a political novel:) It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly, a vote rang out! (14 Nov 83)"

"(After Lucy tells him to write a Thanksgiving novel:) It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly, a turkey rang out! (22 Nov 83)"

"(After Lucy suggests he begin his story with "Once upon a time":) Once upon a time...It was a dark and stormy night. (7 Aug 83)"

"(After Lucy suggests he write a book like If You Give a Mouse a Cookie:) "If You Give a Beagle a Brownie." (15 Jan 94)"

"Once there were two mice who lived in a museum. One evening after the museum had closed, the first mouse crawled into a huge suit of armor. Before he knew it, he was lost. "Help!" he shouted to his friend. "Help me make it through the knight!" (6 Dec 74)"

"The Gift: It was the holiday season. She and her husband had decided to attend a performance of King Lear. It was their first night out together in months. During the second act one of the performers became ill. The manager of the theater walked onto the stage, and asked, "Is there a doctor in the house?" Her husband stood up, and shouted, "I have an honorary degree from Anderson College!" It was at that moment when she decided not to get him anything for Christmas. (22 Dec 74)"

"A new season! This is where I belong! This is my life! I stand here like a captain of a ship! Nothing can sink this vessel except... (Lucy suddenly walks in, announcing she is ready) ..An iceberg! (17 March 97)"

"There's something lonely about a ball field when it's raining... What makes it lonely is being the only one dumb enough to be standing out here... (23 May 81)"

"(after proving there are no spiders in the baseball gloves:) In all the history of baseball, there has never been a manager who has had to go through what I have to go through! (6 Apr 61)"

"(whenever Lucy angers him) Next time, I'll bite her on the leg!"

"My mind reels with sarcastic replies."

"Yes ma'am, I understand, that's life: Front row in the classroom, last row, back deck in the ballpark. (07 Sep 95)"

"Here's (Joe Cool/The World War I Flying Ace/The world-famous (insert occupation here)/etc.)"

"It was a dark and stormy night... (appeared for the first time on 12 Jul 65)"

"(to Snoopy:) Why aren't you a pony?!! (26 Aug 65)"

"Wouldn't it be something if that Little Red-Haired Girl came over here and gave me a kiss? I'd say, "Thank you! What was that for?", and wouldn't it be something if she said, "Because I've always loved you!" Then I'd give her a big hug, and she'd kiss me again! Wouldn't that be something? (Starts eating) Wouldn't it be something if it turned out that french fries were good for you? (26 Feb 81)"

"Theme: Our School. Going to our school is an education in itself, which is not to be confused with actually getting an education. (crumples paper and tosses it, saying "I don't need that kind of trouble!") (10 Sep 73)"

"The largest dinosaur that ever lived was the Bronchitis. It soon became extinct. It coughed a lot. (11 Dec 72)"

"Life is like an ice cream cone...you have to learn to lick it. (11 Aug 68)"

"There are seven continents: Africa, Asia, Australia, Europe, North America, South America, and Aunt Arctica. (5 May 81)"

"Some people are right-handed. Some people are left-handed. There are other people who are able to use both hands with equal ease. Such people are called handbidextrous. (17 Oct 76)"

"(After umpire calls out strike three when he was thinking about Peggy Jean) Whatever happened to strike one and two? (13 Sept 90)"

"Now I know why we play baseball in the summer... When your shoes and socks get knocked off by a line drive, your feet don't get cold! (03 April 79)"

"(sees Lucy wearing one of his shirts:) Well hello there, Charlie Brown, you blockhead!! (Violet and Patty crack up as Lucy sighs and Charlie Brown walks away) (22 Feb 59)"

"No matter how hard you try, you can't... (do something silly and impossible)"

"You blockhead(s)!"

"English Theme: "If I Had A Pony." If I had a pony, I'd saddle up and ride so far from this school it would make your head swim! (29 Sep 70)"

"This is my report on Rain. Rain is water which does not come out of faucets. Without rain, we would not get wet walking to school and catch a cold and have to stay home, which is not a bad idea. Rain was the inspiration for that immortal poem, "Rain, rain, go away, come again some other day." After a storm, the rain goes down the drain which is where I sometimes feel my education is also going. (7 Nov 73)"

"Sometimes you lie in bed at night, and you don't have a single thing to worry about...That always worries me! (6 Jul 85)"

"When writing about Church History, we have to go back to the very beginning. Our Pastor was born in 1930. (4 Sep 75)"