First Quote Added
April 10, 2026
Latest Quote Added
"Andy Hamilton: "Monsieur et Madame Isthesoundof-Aracingcar, and their son, Pierre Isthesoundof-Aracingcar""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr Sayezze and his llama - that's Llama Sayezze" (La Marseillaise)"
"Andy Hamilton: "Monsieur et Madame Theotherone, and their cynical son, Paul Theotherone""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs That-Holeinthegroundcantbeatoilet, and their daughter, Shirley""
"Barry Cryer: "Jacques Delores and his mother, Mère Delores... what did Ma say? She's bored, oh!""
"Andy Hamilton: "From the French farming community, Madame Leadsintothecattletrough & Monsewer Leadsintothecattletrough""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Fembargo, and their cousin, British Bea Fembargo""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Alouetta, and their son, Jonty""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Foursugarsinminelove, and their daughter, Olive Foursugarsinminelove""
"Barry Cryer: "Mr & Mrs Chanceofacupoftea, and their son, Henny""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Kingood, and their daughter, May Kingood""
"Stephen Fry: "There's the Menders family - Rhoda Menders - she digs having her ass felt!"
"Barry Cryer: "It's cabaret time, introduced by Roy Hod - The Pointer Sisters, and a special item - Wagner's Damntheguttering""
"Stephen Fry: "It's high society entrance now, we welcome the noble group, it's Lady Foundationsfirst, Lord Watermess, filthy Prince Everywhere, Count Thecostlater & Baron Bankaccount""
"Barry Cryer: "And their friends Mr & Mrs O'Doors, and their son, Paddy O'Doors""
"Graeme Garden: "From Ireland, Brendan Beam and James Joist, and also Con Crete and Mick Ser...""
"Stephen Fry: "Mr & Mrs Lottleaftoberepainted, and their son, Theo Lottleafttoberepainted""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Bennett-thatstwicetheestimate, and their son, Gordon Bennett-thatstwicetheestimate""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Mr & Mrs Backtofinishthejobonthursdayhonestguv, and their daughter, Isla""
"Stephen Fry: "Mr & Mrs Wallcarpetting, and their son, Walter Wallcarpetting""
"Barry Cryer: "Mr & Mrs Scleavage, and their daughter, Jean Scleavage""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Cottatiling, and their son, Terry Cottatiling""
"Barry Cryer: "Alec Douglas-Exhume""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "From Australia, the grave-faced Digger Pitt""
"Graeme Garden: "An old soul known as Wi'am - he's looking rough - we call him the wreck Wi'am. He trims the grass in the cemetery - he's just crept into the crypt, cropped & crept out again!""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "From the West Country, Eliza Body""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Vault, and their agricultural son, farmer Lee""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Stover, and their father, Pa Stover""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "From Sweden, Lars Rights and Lars Post""
"Graeme Garden: "The Gee sisters, Ella and Ula - they've been laid to rest a few times""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "There's Daddy & Mummy Fied""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "From Scotland - a crazy stone carver - Mon, your mental mason! - he's just had to inter Flora""
"Barry Cryer: "Harry Secombe's gossiping in the corner - Oh! Bitch you 'Arry!""
"Barry Cryer: "It's cabaret time - Tomb Jones singing The Last Vaults""
"Barry Cryer: "Also from Wales - that cheerful soul, Happy Taff, and his brother who's prone to laxatives, Senna Taff, with their friend Ed Stone""
"Graeme Garden: From Scotland - "Lord Wreath""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: From Wales - "Di the Death, who appears to be having a coffin fit""
"Barry Cryer: "A party from the Wild West - all the way from Dirge City - Hearse Cartright, Gene Mortuary, with Roy Rogers and his horse Triggermortis""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Ment, & their newt, Esther Ment""
"Barry Cryer: "Mr & Mrs Rendeth-Thelesson, and their son, Andy""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Ashun-of-the-Magi, and their son, Theodore Ashun-of-the-Magi""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Jenny Flect, Di O'Cese, and Ann Glicanchurch""
"Graeme Garden: "Mr & Mrs Meek, and their saintly son, blessed Arthur Meek""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "A strange couple from the church - a beadle & an abbot - they've formed an unholy alliance to produce Beadles Abbot""
"Tim Brooke-Taylor: "Be Christian, and try not to laugh at the entrance of J-J-J-Justin Pediment""
"Willie Rushton: "Mr & Mrs Nod, and their son, Si""
"Barry Cryer: "Here's Spike Milligan in his Goon persona, representing smooth slip-on Y-fronts - Eccles Easy Elastical""
"Barry Cryer: "It's cabaret time - a parade of knickerless parsons. There are so many of them in a line, they'll get a queue rate. Luckily we have a rev counter!""
"Graeme Garden: "The Right Honourable Charles Ismay-Shepherd, & his father, the Lord Ismay-Shepherd""
"Willie Rushton: "The Collar family, and their son, Doug""