"GP: Is there an essential meaning behind POEE? M2: There is a Zen Story about a student who asked a Master to explain the meaning of Buddhism. The Master's reply was "Three pounds of flax." GP: Is that the answer to my question? M2: No, of course not. That is just illustrative. The answer to your question is FIVE TONS OF FLAX!"

"GP: Maybe you are just crazy. M2: Indeed! But do not reject these teachings as false because I am crazy. The reason that I am crazy is because they are true. GP: Is Eris true? M2: Everything is true. GP: Even false things? M2: Even false things are true. GP: How can that be? M2: I don't know man, I didn't do it. GP: Why do you deal with so many negatives? M2: To dissolve them. GP: Will you develop that point? M2: No."

"Some excerpts from an interview with Malaclypse the Younger by THE GREATER METROPOLITAN YORBA LINDA HERALD-NEWS-SUN-TRIBUNE-JOURNAL-DISPATCH-POST AND SAN FRANCISCO DISCORDIAN SOCIETY CABAL BULLETIN AND INTERGALACTIC REPORT & POPE POOP. GREATER POOP: Are you really serious or what? MAL-2: Sometimes I take humor seriously. Sometimes I take seriousness humorously. Either way it is irrelevant."

"Before I was a Discordian, I took life much too seriously. When you take life too seriously you start to wonder what the point of it all is. When you wonder what the point is in life, you fall into a trap of thinking there is one. When you think there is a point, you finally realize there is no point. And what point is there in living like that? Nowadays I skip the search for a point and find, instead, the punch lines."

"The foregoing document was revealed to Mal-2 by the Goddess Herself through many consultations with Her within his Pineal Gland. It is guaranteed to be the Word of Goddess. However, it is only fair to state that Goddess doesn't always say the same thing to each listener, and that other Episkoposes are sometimes told quite different things in their Revelations, which are also the Word of Goddess. Consequently, if you prefer a Discordian Sect other than POEE, then none of these Truths are binding, and it is a rotten shame that you have read all the way down to the very last word."

"One day, I came upon a man urinating in a bus station. When I confronted him about his action, he turned to me, without stopping, and said:"

"Just keep saying to yourself "I'm adequate.""

"There are no masses in Virginia City, only individuals whose will for good or bad can bring them to the ends they ought to have. I like that very much."

"Lambert Wilson - The Merovingian"

"Helmut Bakaitis - The Architect"

"Gloria Foster - The Oracle"

"Hugo Weaving - Agent Smith"

"Carrie-Anne Moss - Trinity"

"Laurence Fishburne - Morpheus"

"Keanu Reeves - Neo"

"Desert of the real."

"Reload before the revolution begins."

"Reload in IMAX. Think big."

"Free your mind."

"Mark my words, boy, and mark them well. I survived your predecessors and I will survive you."

""Handle" us?! You'll "handle" us?! You know, your predecessors had a lot more respect!"

"Choice is an illusion, created between those with power, and those without."

"Who has time? Who has time? But then if we do not ever take time, how can we ever have time?"

"I'm sorry, gentlemen, but this is a dead end."

"We're not here because we're free; we're here because we're not free. There's no escaping reason, no denying purpose, for as we both know, without purpose we would not exist. It is purpose that created us, purpose that connects us, purpose that pulls us, that guides us, that drives us; it is purpose that defines, purpose that binds us. We are here because of you, Mr. Anderson. We're here to take from you what you tried to take from us... Purpose!"

"I killed you, Mr. Anderson, I watched you die; and with a certain satisfaction, I might add. And then something happened. Something that I knew was impossible, but it happened anyway: you destroyed me, Mr. Anderson. Afterward, I knew the rules, I understood what I was supposed to do, but I didn't. I couldn't. I was compelled to stay. Compelled to disobey. And now here I stand because of you, Mr Anderson. Because of you, I'm no longer an agent of this system. Because of you, I'm changed, unplugged, a new man, so to speak, like you, apparently free."

"Then tomorrow we may all be dead, but how would that be different from any other day? This is a war, and we are soldiers. Death can come for us at any time, in any place. Now consider the alternative. What if I am right? What if the prophecy is true? What if tomorrow the war could be over? Isn't that worth fighting for? Isn't that worth dying for?"

"Choice. The problem is choice."

"I think if God is dead he laughed himself to death. Because, you see, we live in Eden. Genesis has got it all wrong — we never left the Garden. Look about you. This is paradise. It's hard to find, I'll grant you, but it is here. Under our feet, beneath the surface, all around us is everything we want. The earth is shining under the soot. We are all fools. Ha ha! Moriarty has made fools of all of us. But together, — you and I, tonight, — we'll bring him down."

"Dear friends, would those of you who know what this is all about please raise your hands?"