"Casting this spell causes matter in the surrounding area to mutate into a demented, intelligent, and laughing cleaver. The Aedile randomly determines which matter. This animated cleaver revels in bloodlust, and will turn against the caster if the cleaver does not attack within 1 minute. If no other creatures who may bleed are within the area, then the cleaver attacks the caster. Whenever the cleaver attacks, it laughs hysterically with an evil tone. Upon each successful cleave, the Happy Cleaver makes a slurping sound as if enjoying the blood that flows freely from the gaping wound. ping wound. The cleaver attacks 6 times per round, doing 1d10 LP of damage, but it has no Delivery Penalty. With an Intelligence of 30, it is unable to speak, but laughs coherently. The cleaver has a mind of its own and does not need the caster to wield it. The cleaver magically propels itself through the air. Wizards have never been able to understand why, but Happy Cleavers prefer to hack female dancers to pieces."