"Oh, you're up! I ran out of paint before I could finish, so I had to improvise. It was a bit drab up here, so I thought I'd properly christen our new ship. Much more homey, don't you think? The German Third Reich's Atlantic Naval Fleet Flagship Adler is now commencing operations."

"Its him! The voice of madness is coming. Raising the stench of death as he clenches the reins heading straight for us with his black iron horses in tow/He approaches, the harbinger of insanity. He is coming for me now atop his black iron stag and in his hands he holds the subtle fragrance of death."

"(watching her soldiers react to the fully-vampirized Seras) "What...? How is this possible? They're trembling! These battle-hardened Waffen-SS...these vampires who charged into gunfire and grenades without a moment's hesitation! They're ready to piss themselves at the sight of a girl! One stupid little girl who's more dead than alive! What the hell's going on?! Verdammt!""

"Up, up! Down, down! Left, right, left, right! Bringing the motherfucking death by Konami! Man, I'm so fucking hard right now."

"Fuck, these are some fine cigars. Like, all bourgeois and shit. I mean, come on, that's just fucked up! People are starving in the world, and she's wasting money on this? A slow and agonising death is too good for that stick-up-her-ass bitch. I think it's time someone gave her an old-fashioned working-class asskicking!"

"Little Hellsing chickie, we're coming to find you. Come out and play, little Hellsing. I promise it's going to be a lot of fun. We just want to torture you, kill you, maybe skullfuck your corpse a couple of times, burn your house to the ground, and go home and masturbate, okaaay?"

"(pinned by Seras) "FUCK! Ow! Lemme go! I'm supposed to be on top, bitch!""

"What are you? What the hell are you?!"

"Shut up! You're nothing but the Hellsing family toy! A dog for the Church of England not even fit to call himself a vampire!"

"See, I so fucking told you! Ha ha ha! Well, since I'm fucked, how about I piss a little wisdom on you dipshits? You can take this clue and shove it up your ass, bitch! Beware...the Millennium!"

"Er...hello? Is this thing on? Cool. This message is going out to the Round Table Conference, and a very personal and heart-filled shout-out to the queen bitch herself, Miss Hellsing! All right! Your ass is currently being kicked by the Valentine Brothers! My name is Jan Valentine, and I can't wait to meet each and every one of you. We'll be getting intimate as soon as me and the boys finish lunch, so let me be the first to thank you for providing us with these tasty snacks! By tomorrow, Hellsing will be nothing more than a pile of shit. You got nowhere left to run and nowhere to hide. ‘Cause now, I’m gonna kill you. I want to see you cry and beg. In the meantime, I highly recommend pissing yourselves, followed by a course of praying to your impotent God! But hey! You can try being a man and just kill yourselves. Thank you, London! We love you! GOODNIGHT!"

"I'm here on the direct orders from His Holiness. Otherwise I would not bother with you filthy creatures! So just shut up and pay attention, you miserable English sow!"

"The great vampire Alucard, the Hellsing family's pet creature; I don't believe I've ever seen you in person before. It's a great pleasure to make your acquaintance."

"I think you'll agree that turnabout is fair play...so why don't we make this fight interesting? [snaps fingers] ANDERSON!!!"

"My name is Enrico Maxwell. I'm the head of the Iscariot organization; I am honored to meet you."

"The only good Protestant is a dead Protestant!"

"He may act like he's not injured, but he's taking far more damage than I am. I can beat him!"

"(After Walter kills a few of Jan's Ghouls) "Oh man, that's fucking great. Cause I gotta tell ya, plowing through you guys was really starting to bore the fuck outta me!""

"But you did more than help fund the operation, and you were more than a mere pawn. The title more suited to you, my friend, is collaborator."

"Now then, let's go and die like mangy dogs. Let's die while yelling "Fuck, Fuck!" as we take gut shots. As we writhe in agony."

"Oh, the iniquity! Damn you, bourgeoisie! Damn you!"

"Face it, this room will be our tomb; the mansion our gravestone; and our gravekeeper will be that cast-iron bitch Integra. And our epitaph? "Here lies the fearsome Wild Geese who kicked beaucoup Nazi ass for queen and crumpets." But they won't write any of that. Because of you it'll say: "Here lies those gutless pussies that died pissing themselves and screaming like schoolgirls. Man the fuck up, bitch! You'll die with honor even if I have to tie you to your damn post! You take the money because you like it, and you fight because you like it and now... you're going to die like a merc and like it!"

"What was that? Some kind of evil love beam?"

"[his hands begin to shake erratically during his battle with Alucard] Grh... my body... is starting to give out! I prepared for this... I rebelled knowing this would happen... this was always inevitable."

"We are the evening's entertainment. And I... just wanted to do something with my time on the stage worthy of applause."

"It was never about the money, it was always about the fun."

"The show is over, Mina. The curtain's falling, we've taken our bows, it's high time we made our exit."

"Now then, its time to take these children across my knee."

"I answer to no man's will, but my own. I am myself in mind, body, and soul. I am Walter C. Dornez, the angel of death, and as the dawn light cuts through the darkness, so shall I reap all of your souls in bloody turn."

"You once told me, Alucard, that true immortals don't exist... you might be onto something, so let's put it to the test! Let's keep killing you until you stay down."

"Miss Integra, back the car up and find another way around."

"Did you forget who made that gun for you...? That gun was meant to defeat Anderson, and I'm no Anderson."

"Disgusting, no? It's plunder from when they ransacked Europe half a century ago. These bastards shook out whole countries like piggy-banks, taking everything of value. No matter how small. Everything from gold ingots and wads of cash down to pocket watches and gold teeth. The fearsome Schutzstaffel. They think they're Nietzsche's wet dream, but they're just vultures picking at the dead. They're a bunch of misfits who think war is some kind of costume ball. The invincible army? The knights of steel? What a pack of losers."

"England...is guilty! The heathens...are guilty! You are all now sentenced...to your death! Death! Death! Death! DEATH!"

"What up, bitch?"

"You're too loud, Police Girl. I don't care if you are a vampire. You're still English; have some manners."

"I cut my finger. I don't want it to get infected. Kiss it for me."

"Just what I expected from a king of vampires. Or a count."

"Don't underestimate humanity, you freaks! Come on! Let's have it!"

"I really don't care who you are. just tell me what you want."

"You've done nothing but show contempt for our treaties. This latest incident with Anderson in Northern Ireland was inexcusable."

"I hope you can claim your iron cross from your corporal, in hell."

"Don't you dare question my resolve! I have already given you your marching orders, soldier! You will search and destroy! SEARCH AND DESTROY! Any resistance you encounter is to be CRUSHED! Hellsing does not run from our enemies! Kill them all! I order you to leave nothing but bloody stains in your wake!"

"(after defeating The Captain) "He looked like a child. Who just woken up from a pleasant dream. These men... They've been trapped in the same dream since World War II. But tonight, Mr. Bernadotte, I'll wake them up. All of them.""

"They have dared to enter this house, built on blood and honour. I will see them roast in the deepest pits of Hell!"

"Master, you seem to have grown a mustache."

"It felt like if I drank the blood, it would mean the end of something important inside of me."