"Jason always wanted to be a documentary filmmaker. But for his senior class project, he decided to try to make a horror film. That's what he was shooting on that first night, the night when... everything changed."

"Tatiana Maslany - Mary Dexter"

"Amy Lalonde - Tracy Thurman"

"George Buza - Biker"

"Philip Riccio - Ridley Wilmott"

"Scott Wentworth - Andrew Maxwell"

"Joe Dinicol - Eliot Stone"

"Michelle Morgan - Debra Moynihan"

"Joshua Close - Jason Creed"

"Shawn Roberts - Tony Ravello"

"A new vision of terror from the legendary filmmaker"

"Shoot the dead."

"Where will you be when the end begins?"

"Hi, my name is Jay... Jason Creed, and I have been given the opportunity, given the gift to be able to document the events that have suddenly landed in my lap. And I just want to let you guys know, the audience know, that I'm gonna do my best to capture the truth with me and my friends. There's gonna be no fakeness. I'm gonna go after everything. Really raw, really real. And I'm going to do the best job I can. And I'm just really excited to be given this opportunity. And I am not going to fuck it up."

"Jason once said he thought he could help, maybe even save some lives. This is the last thing he downloaded before he died: a couple of hometown Joes who went out to shoot at targets. But that day, they used people. Dead people. You know, just for fun? There was one target that was different from the rest. A woman... tied by her hair to the branch of a tree. The boys had this one set up just for kicks. They got out their favorite 12 gauge and... [shoots and a zombie's head is blown in half] Are we worth saving? You tell me."

"The more voices there are, the more spin there is. The truth becomes that much harder to find. In the end it's all just noise."

"Jason was compelled. I had never seen him like that before. What is it? What gets into our heads when we see something horrible? A horrible accident on the highway. Something keeps us from just driving on. Something holds us. But we don't stop to help. We stop to look."

"It's interesting how quickly we find out what we're capable of becoming. Up until that night, we had lived predictable lives. Now... we would never be able to predict what might happen next. God had changed the rules on us. And surprisingly, we were playing along."

"It's funny. You spend so much time resenting your parents, separating yourself, building your own life. But as soon as the shit hits the fan, the only place you want to go is home."

"We made a film - the one I'm going to show you now. Actually, Jason was the one who wanted to make it. Like that cameraman from Channel 10, he wanted to upload it so that people, you, could be told the truth. The film was shot with a Panasonic HDX-900 and an HBX-200. I did the final cut on Jason's laptop. I've added music occasionally for effect, hoping to scare you. You see, in addition to trying to tell you the truth, I am hoping to scare you so that maybe you'll wake up. Maybe you won't make any of the same mistakes that we made. Anyway, here it is, Jason Creed's The Death of Death."

"George A. Romero - Chief of Police"

"Chris Violette - Gordo Thorsen"

"Alan van Sprang - Colonel"

"Martin Roach - Stranger"

"Megan Park - Francine Shane"

"Tino Monte - Newscaster"

"R. D. Reid - Amish Farmer"

"It's always open. Her way out is always open."

"You let the dead get in."

"They don't dream, you know. The dead don't dream, and the dead never sleep. They wait, they watch for a way to get back. My baby told me to, just like your's will tell you, and you have to do it. You have to send it back. They stopped me. Don't let them stop you. You have to listen to the voices."

"(To Samara) I'm not your fucking mommy!"

"You can't have my son."

"(To Aidan) Whenever you feel alone, you just call my name. I'll follow the sound of your voice."

"You guys wanna know something real fucked up and awesome that I did? I took a Korean guy's toothbrush and I rubbed it all over my dick!"

"His dick smells like shit dude!"

"Dude, this chick is giving me such a boner. Its awesome!"

"You fucking pissed on me, you racist fuck!"

"Its not a bomb, its a bong"

"Ugh, smells like burnt asshole."

"Meet the smokeless bong"

"Dude, whats a blumpkin?"

"[Reciting the poem 'The Square Root of 3'] I fear that I will always be / A lonely number like root three / A three is all that's good and right, / Why must my three keep out of sight / Beneath a vicious square root sign, / I wish instead I were a nine / For nine could thwart this evil trick, / with just some quick arithmetic / I know I'll never see the sum, as 1.7321 / Such is my reality, a sad irrationality / When hark! What is this I see, / Another square root of a three / Has quietly come waltzing by, / Together now we multiply / To form a number we prefer, / Rejoicing as an integer / We break free from our mortal bonds / And with a wave of magic wands / Our square root signs become unglued / And love for me has been renewed."

"Jesus, Kumar. I don't like it so much."

"[Dressed in KKK clothes after coming to a KKK barbeque and was asked to say 1 racist thing you did in the week] I did knee an Indian guy in the balls."

"Oh, yeah! Yeah, it's sweet! 'Cuz we're fugitives. Driving a yellow convertible with the top down, dressed like assholes!"

"Watch out for cheetahs! This is cheetah turf!"

"[Discovers that Kumar has brought weed on the airplane] You brought weed on the fucking airplane?!"

"It's not that Guantánamo Bay itself is funny, but it's utterly ridiculous for Harold and Kumar to be thrown in there."

"Our top priority was to make people laugh, but the secondary priority is that there's something a little smarter below the surface. I guess in a certain way it's our reaction to post-9/11 paranoia."

"What in the nigger was that?"