"Kill my stomach if I'm hungry! Shut off my want if I'm lonely! Tear off my genitals if I'm aroused!! Excess!!! So much excess!! It's so much superfluous nonsense, and I want nothing to do with it if I can help it!!!"

"I know forgiveness is out of the question. I just ask for what we all ask of the people we respect - that the thought of me does not compel you to violent spasms of projectile vomiting."

"I like you immensely, Devi. And to prove it, I shall obliterate all of my affection and interest for you. Just like before, but different. I cannot hurt what I do not acknowledge. I don't know of anyone that I love, or of anyone that loves me, but I give you what I can. I give my nothing."

"I've excluded happiness as one of those possibilities we seek for ourselves. Oh, I still want it, but that's beside the point. Contentment - they say it's the ultimate, but I can't even wish for that. I don't even want the desire to be content. I can only hope for silence."

"The world would be so much nicer if people only used guns on themselves."

"I can't let you go. We've begun something lovely, and, as with all things that start, it, inevitably, ends! The beginning is always so fine!! But decay soon follows. A degeneration into the tired old situation. The rot sets in. This way, there is only the beauty of the start!"

"Trust me, I know what self-loathing is, but to kill myself? That would put a damper on my search for answers. Not at all productive."

"Think of that sensation as reassurance that you are not dead yet."

"Dear Die-ary, today I stuffed some dolls full of dead rats I put in the blender. I'm wondering if, maybe, there really is something wrong with me."

"Without fail!! EVERY time I leave my house, it's as if I've given up my every right to be left alone, or treated with respect!!! You flies with your unyielding little minds!!! You think my difference from you is an excuse to 'comment' on me, as if I were on DISPLAY for you!!!"

"Wacky!? What the hell kind of word is that? WACKY!? I HATE that word!! Fewer words are as excruciatingly stupid!!! And used in description of me!! FOOK!"

"I never drank her blood! Never! But I needed it! You see!! It changes color when it dries! It NEVER stays! I HAVE to keep the wall wet!"

"Any pile of stunted growth unaware that entertainment is just that and nothing more, deserves to doom themselves to some dank cell, somewhere, for having been so stupid!! Movies, books, T.V., music - They're all just entertainment, not guidebooks for damning yourself!"

"Whether in a suit, or in a loincloth, people are ignorant little thorns cutting into one another."

"I was just drawing a comic; Happy Noodle Boy. It's really popular with the homeless insane."

"Two nights ago, I was taking a walk at night, and this little chihuahua started following me!!! GODDAMMIT!! IT KNEW!! I ran, and finally lost it, and made it home!!! BUT IT KNEW!! IT KNEWWWW!! Did the DOG SEND YOU?!"

"Hey, sorry about the window, but I noticed it was locked. I don't suggest you ever lock it again."

"Hmm? What's that Shmee? Mm, Hmm. Yeeess. Hmm? Yeah. Really? Uh, Huh. Okaay. What? Hmm. Well FUCK YOU MR. BEAR!!! You speak LIES!!! LIIIIES!!! Stuffed with pure venom, you vile lint infested bastard!! How many more, like you, are there?!! How many more?!!! You can't even imagine the things I've endured!! And always at the hands of shit like you!!! You don't know the truth!!!"

"Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death. I see by the looks of you that you understand."

"WHERE THE FUCK IS THE BACTINE!!"

"And though this gets me no absolution, I WOULD NEVER DO WHAT YOU DID TO THAT GIRL!! YOU ABOMINATION OF MENTAL SUBVERSION!! OH, LOOK!! AN ORIFICE. HOW DO YOU LIKE BEING FUCKED WITH STEEL?!!"

"Just because we've similar interests does not guarantee you're going to like me! My foot in your ass is a good example of that. My delusionary hell does not agree with yours!!"

"Imagine a sculptor being confronted by a stranger, who, as it turns out, confesses to revere our sculptor. Imagine the flattery known to anybody who is told they've inspired some noble aspiration in somebody. The student then presents our sculptor with a work fashioned after the sculptor's own style - a likeness of the student himself. It is a monstrosity! A fucking mess. Even worse, is that our artist sees that this piece of shit before him is a more reasonable facsimile of his own work than he'd like to think. You fucking idiot!! Admire me?!! You shit!!! I'm the villain in this fucking story!"

"You know that feeling you get? The one where you just know you're going to projectile vomit out of every orifice? I feel that right now. I want you away. Leave me to my vomit."

"Does light even EXIST when the refrigerator door is shut!?"

"Either my hair burned off in hell, or I sleep-shaved it during a really stupid dream."

"Funny thing is, Pinocchio's a real boy now but his wiring's all fucked up."

"I detest sleep. I've got better things to do. Besides, I find it frightening - to awaken and be unsure of everything you remember about life not being just part of a dream. Waking means I've slept, and sleep dissolves what certainty I have left."

"I wonder if I'm still crazy. Go find a cheerleader and saw her legs off. OKAY, that answers that."

"A cheerleader! PURE EVIL!!"

"You people!! Shit!! You're all idiots!! I admit to being weak and catering to some minor transgression or two, but this place is sick. But I won't let myself give the issue respect by addressing it any furth... YOU STINK!!!! Focusing on the mundane! Money!! Fashion!! Cream cheese!! You're in Hell and you're too stupid to know it!"

"Damn! Hell makes a yummy bagel."

"Shit! This is awful. At least alive there were nice people mixed in with the social maggots."

"It's okay! I'm alright! I think my spine has exploded, but I'm fine."

"I wonder if you can kill the Devil."

"You know, that fat little lawn gnome of a God wouldn't answer some easy questions!!! I'm criminally insane - I don't know what HIS reason is for being SO FUCKED UP!!"

"Do you have ANY idea what's going on down there?!! Hideous things! People are suffering, and people like...well...ME, heh, are running around!! Suicide, genocide!! People are killing MOOSE!! You buy a video game system, and a better one comes out in a month!!! Powdered eggs?!!! Self esteem is so low, girls are buyin wonder bras!!! Do you see!? DO YOU?"

"I've been talking to dead rabbits and feeding bloody walls. I've done horrifying things with salad tongs. It's really eaten into my social life."

"Dear Diary, I seem to be dead."

"No more stars... no... clouds... nothing... hsssss... It's such an easy thing to say you hate something... so easy to hate... what a piece of shit I am... I ca...can't believe I went the easy way... I thought I knew... I wish I knew something... anything. Ehhh... Actually... your head looks more like a reject jellybean."

"This isn't pleasant... I'd rather not be dead... Don't want to die... Don't... Geez... This is worse than goth poetry... Agg..."

"Killing someone who's bleeding to death. Fff...fuck, you people...you...how stupid you are. Resorting to the same old, monkey brutality, afraid to look up from your bloody dicks. Afraid of transcendence. Hey...your head looks like a potato. And how stupid was I? I, actually paid attention to you! Devoted precious thought to it. God...I used to love the noises I heard in my head. Hhh...I never should've left my room...my room, out there, I almost remember it. It's gone now...along with everything else...vanishing. Heh...potato."

"Yes, yes, yes. I'm the one that's been killing all those people. But I'm also the creative force behind Happy Noodle Boy, so forgive me and shut up."

"I wish... I wish someone would just switch me off and... fix me."

"We think we are so great in our protests...but we just become the bitter offspring of what we oppose. We become prisoners in our own cages. We begin to speak in badly constructed melodramatic prose! OH, RAGING HORROR!! Make this stop!!"

"Johnny "Whew! Thanks. I haven't cleaned my fridge out in awhile, and well... You know."

"Victim "mmph... It tastes okay.""

"Johnny "EAT THE FUCKIN' WEENIE!!!""

"Victim "umm..""

"Johnny "THESE FUDGE-POPS! FREEZER BURN?! FREEZER BURN?!""