"Fifteen years later, and my early, illustrious English education has clearly paid off. At the time of writing this, I am unemployed and addicted to Postmates. I am also about to beat Sonic Adventure 2 for the first time in over a decade, and have been forced to reconcile my nostalgia with the harsh reality that it is not a terrific game: The controls are frustrating, the “treasure-hunting” levels dramatically upset the game’s pace and the Doomsday plot reads like a Bob Books Armageddon."

"Developers simply don’t make games like Sonic Adventure 2 anymore. It’s a totally innocent, bubbly game that doesn’t bother with a complicated plot or clever scriptwriting. The dialogue is as eye-rollingly cheesy as ever, but it wouldn’t work any other way, and it just wants to you to sit back and have a ball playing it."

"I'll find my own way home. Bye-bye."

"The soundtrack is definitive. Pop culture pundits will tell you that the quintessential piece of video game music is the theme to 1985’s Super Mario Bros. To ’80s kids, that’s probably still the case. But to a generation of gamers who came of age in the late ’90s and early ’00s—especially those who were reared on primordial, “All Your Base Are Belong To Us”-esque meme culture— Sonic Adventure 2‘s “Escape from the City” is an epochal anthem. It’s a song cherished by so many that some have even fought to have it replace the Star-Spangled Banner as the United States’ national anthem."

"Whew, that big truck scared me."

"Whoo-hoo! It's like a trampoline!"

"I’d heard time and time again that Adventure 2 was Sonic’s magnum opus. [...] But it hasn’t aged well. Hell, I don’t even know if it was considered good at the time. Reading about frustrations I had on old forums, I found people from two decades ago moaning about the same things, but the slither of good seems to have washed away the rest as time marched on. [...] The speedster levels are incredible, and easily some of the best 3D platforming out there. But that only makes up a third of the game. The rest is split between frustrating treasure hunting, in which you follow a janky detector in wide-open levels that take an age to complete, and a clumsy tank shooter that, when it tries to sprinkle in platforming, falls at the first hurdle. [...] [Playing as] the other characters [is a grating chore] that you have to push through to get to the good stuff, which is a strong way to sour the entire experience considering they make up two-thirds of it. [...] Many boss fights are just the equivalent character from the opposite story, i.e. Shadow vs. Sonic, which is pretty dull since you can just spam leap on their head to win most fights."

"Phew. I was a little scared."

"[while being picked up] Hey! Stop it!"

"[Sigh] I was so scared. What hint?"

"I plan to give you a taste of my revenge, once all the seven Chaos Emeralds are collected. Once I initiate this program, it cannot be disabled. All of you ungrateful humans who took everything away from me, will feel my loss, and despair!"

"Sayonara, Shadow the Hedgehog."

"This is a death sentence for every human being on Earth. If my calculations are correct, the Space Colony ARK will impact the Earth in twenty-seven minutes and fifty-three seconds. All of you will be destroyed, along with your beloved planet Earth."

"For all the people on that planet."

"It's too high here. I'm scared of heights!"

"Oooh, I hate it when they leave me behind."

"I hate you! You guys always leave me behind and have all the FUN! (voice echoes)"

"What's the matter, Sonic?"

"Shadow, I beg of you, please, do it for me."

"Just wait a minute!"

"Wow! I'm flying!"

"Just let it go! You just don't know when to give up, do you?"

"I thought I could do it!"

"Is this it?"

"You! I'll make you pay for this!"

"Oh no! My power is going down!"

"Because you just told me, fox boy!"

"What was that all about? And look what you did to my Emerald!"

"Sounds more like the work of Shadow!"

"This time I'll let you go. But the next time we meet, you won't be so lucky."

"Well, I guess I can use it for something. I'll just take it with me. Farewell knucklehead!"

"You thought you could trick me with that fake emerald, didn't you?"

"Those idiots will never find my hidden base inside this pyramid. Let's take care of business here first, then get inside."

"5 minutes should be plenty, here I go!"

"Hah, hah, hah! Citizens of Earth, lend me your ears and listen to me very carefully! My name is Dr. Eggman, the world's greatest scientist, and soon to be the world's greatest ruler! Now, witness the beginning of the greatest empire of all time!"

"What's that? Is that you, Sonic? Are you trying to spoil my plans again? Wait a minute, you're not Sonic. This is impossible!"

"Before this is over, I'll show you the true power of CHAOS CONTROL!!"

"So, there's more to you than just looking like me. What are you anyway?"

"So this is the space colony ARK. I have got to locate the central control room that Shadow mentioned before he left."

"I see. But you know, I can't let you live. Your adventuring days are coming to an end."

"There's no time to play games. You won't even get the chance!"

"I came here following the signal from the Emerald… If I'm not mistaken, this is the Master Emerald, is it not?"

"Faker? I think you're the fake hedgehog around here. You're comparing yourself to me… ha! You're not even good enough to be my fake."

"Look, half of the moon is gone??"

"The wind is free, but the sand goes where it is blown. Unaware of the world around it. Whirling on the breath of the Gods, at the mercy of the storm that engulfs it. What is one grain of sand in the desert? One grain amongst the storm?"

"Sorry is not good enough. You have failed me for the last time, lieutenant!"

"This isn't the last time we meet, Jimmy Neutron!"

"I've made up my mind. I won't ever falter."

"David Herman as Erol"

"I am the one of many, I mean the one and only, little guy."