"[Reading a profile on Smith] National sports pistol champion at age 10. Recruited by the army. Then he disappeared. Sound like black ops got him and trained him."

"(On a cell phone, while aiming a gun at Smith) I can't talk right now, honey. I'm right in the middle of something."

"Oh, c'mon, Smith. Guns don't kill people... [grins] but they sure help!"

"(upon seeing he ran over a robotic decoy of Oliver) What in the hell is that? Oh, my God, that is twisted. That sick son of a bitch. That sick son of a bitch suckered us again!"

"My God. Do we really suck, or is this guy really that good?"

"Does anyone know what a Jimmy Cagney love scene is? It's when Cagney lets the good guy live. [lobby of henchmen laugh] And if that happens in this show, I'm gonna do a lot more than ask for my money back."

"I was just remembering a limerick. "There once was a woman who was quite begat. She had three babies named Nat, Pat, and Tat. She said it was fun in the breeding, but found it was hell in the feeding when she saw there was no tit for Tat." You have caused me no end of trouble, but now I shall return the favor. Tit for tat, right?"

"This is the '90s. You don't just go around punching people. You have to say something cool first"

"Billy Blanks - Billy Cole"

"Badja Djola - Alley Thug"

"Taylor Negron - Milo"

"Water is wet, the sky is blue, women have secrets ... who gives a fuck?"

"Danielle Harris - Darian Hallenbeck"

"Chelsea Field - Sarah Hallenbeck"

"Damon Wayans - James Alexander Dix"

"Bruce Willis - Joseph Cornelius Hallenbeck"

"Everyone had counted them out. But they're about to get back in the game."

"They're two fallen heroes up against the gambling syndicate in pro sports."

"The goal is to survive."

"Inspector: This is a police matter, you dumb son of a bitch! And I'm sick and tired of sweeping up your dead bodies! Now the next time I see your ugly mug...I'm gonna put a bullet in it! You got it?"

"Billy Cole: Ain't life a bitch?"

"Sarah Hallenbeck: Call your shrink, Joe! Call him and tell him that you're fucking losing it!"

"Darian Hallenbeck: (to Jimmy) What the hell is that number on the back of your head? What is that, like a license plate in case someone tries to steal it?"

"Push this vile, fuck off the road man!"

"You back off Joseph... Or I'm gonna show your daughter what a hot date I am..."

"[Threatening Joe with his knife] You think you are so fucking cool, don't you? You think you are so fucking cool. But just once, I would like to hear you scream in pain..."

"Excuse me, but did any of you stupid shits bother to frisk this FUCK?!"

"I am the bad guy."

"Naughty boy, Joseph... You just killed a police officer."

"[Before shooting a cop, "Good morning gentlemen, is there a problem?"] Yes, officer, as a matter of fact there is a problem, apparently there are too many bullets in this gun."

"If you go any faster we're gonna travel back through time."

"[Jimmy has just survived being thrown off an overpass and is now trying to calm startled motorists] It's okay. It's okay, folks. It's okay. It's okay. Thank you. Thank you. Danger is my middle name. Don't try this at home, folks. I'm a trained professional. There's me, and there's Super Dave.[Passes out]"