"Elaine never liked my sister Patty. Maybe it was because Patty was a free spirit. I say free spirit because I'm uncomfortable calling my own sister... sexually indescriminate trailer trash."

"Zeus as Rex the dog"

"Seymour Cassel as Uncle Jack"

"Ken Magee as Butcher"

"Tammy Blanchard as Noreen"

"Richard Jenkins as Mr. Cook"

"A comedy about doing the wrong things... for the right reasons."

"Chris Penn as David Loach"

"Tom Green as Duff"

"Why is anybody talking?"

"Leslie Mann as Elaine"

"Who do you think I am, Albert fuckin' Trump?"

"Megan Mullally as Patty"

"All right American beef cattle, just stay calm, and you'll all get to go home to your precious TV dinners!"

"[After having been humped by a dog] It's a good thing your here officers, because a crime has just been committed."

"Okay, just so we're all on the same page, I'm flying right now! Angel Dust! So lets keep it real, boys, keep it real and nobodys getting hurt."

"See those dead plants? I planted those."

"I'm not liquid... I'm not... liquid."

"Dora Romano as Maria AKA 'Aunt Esmeralda'"

"Nothing could hold a candle to the fetish crime I just endured."

"I wanted to scope the place out. I was hungry so I decided to heat up a brick of cheese. I need my cheese."

"Elaine... I like her. I like her a lot, John. But she's a bitch! She's a dirty, dumb bitch."

"We've been banging together like a pair of cymbals in an overworked marching band."

"Dennis Farina as Mr. Warner"

"We're going skiing."

"The branch! Swing from the branch Rickey!"

"Tommy Rodger as Domenick"

"Toni Collette as Kristin"

"Tim Daish as Paul"

"w:Mitch SalmMitch Salm as Wayne"

"Jay Natelle as Hank"

"Monica Bellucci as Bianca"

"[Referring to laptop image] When was the last time you saw a thigh gap like that?"

"Alessandro Bressanello as Don Giuseppe Balbano"

"Yonv Joseph as Randy"

"Eduardo Scarpetta as Fabrizio"

"You can do a lot of good with the power you have. It's not about losing yourself. It's about - becoming yourself."

"Just because you're a mafia boss doesn't mean you have to be a bad person."