"Ron Hitler-Barassi: They've talked about the death of the novel and they've talked about the fact that art in Australia is spiralling downward and I think TISM on Review is confirming that fact. You know, like, for 10 years, Review viewers, we've been slagging you lot off. I know you're expecting some pencil-neck geek with short cropped blonde hair and a black polo necked sweater and drinking his latté talking about some crappy artist that's getting my taxes for years and years and here you have TISM the sort of artists for people who aren't creative, you know. We're from the solidly middle class. We're the artists for people who went to government schools, you know. So I'd like all you Review listeners to put down your latté's and turn up your home stereos and your 48 inch colour TV and get a taste of real life instead of sitting back on your black spotty behind, taking my taxes and thinking you're so creative. Don't you agree, Humphrey?"

"Humphrey B. Flaubert: Oh, I agree with everything you said, except for every third word."

"Humphrey B. Flaubert: I would like to say, to all the people of Australia: "Kick me - I'm different.""

"Humphrey B. Flaubert: I’m certainly always proud of everything we do. It’s sort of like when I’m proud of my poo. I look down on it and think "that’s well-formed, that means I’m healthy."