Killer Klowns from Outer Space

"[after just witnessing the blinding light] Well I'll be hornswaggled! Did you see that little ole sky doggy zip down there, Pooh? [Looks at his comic]] Haley's Comet! And it's landed in our backyard! [Excitedly runs into his house to get his shovel, axe, and pick]] This is out lucky day! We gonna be rich! Pooh, we gonna be rich! Thousands of people are comin'! Gonna have hot dogs and helicopters and airplanes and tacos! This is our lucky day! Pooh, we gonna be rich!"

"[Encountering the Big Top] Well I'll be greased and fried! What in blue blazes is the circus doing here in these parts? I love the circus! Come on! Maybe we can get some free passes. [Noticing the purple lights on the tent's cables] I've never seen one that looked like this 'un before. Well... I don't know Pooh, you know there's something kinda peculiar around here. Where is everybody? There's nobody around. Where's the dang ticket booth? [A shadow from inside the tent follows them] How are we supposed to get in and see the show?"

"[Discovering Pooh has been dognapped] What in tarnation is going on here! Where's my dog?! Where's my Pooh Bear?! I'LL TEAR THIS THING APART WITH MY BARE HANDS!!!"

"They took your wife away in a balloon? Well you don't need the police, pal, you need a psychiatrist!"

"I made it through Korea I can make it through this bullshit!"

"I'm supposed to read you your rights. But you're in Mooney's jail, and you ain't got no rights!"

"Amusement Park Guard: What are ya gonna do with those pies, boys?"

"Paul Terenzi: [as Jo-Jo The Ice Cream Clown] I'm Jo-Jo the ice cream clown with the bestest ice cream in town! We'll give you a stick, you'll give it a lick. And it'll tickle you all the way down. Ice cream! ice cream! We brought our goodies here to you! A tasty treat for while you screw! Let's take a break! Cool off those hot lips with our frozen fruity bars! Icy-Wicies, Fudgy-Wudgy bars. And everyone's frozen delight, the Lick-a-Stick!"

"Debbie Stone: Nobody's gonna put me in a balloon again!"

"In Space, No One Can Eat Ice Cream!"

"Alien Bozos With An Appetite For Close Encounters."

"Horrific Harlequins With An Appetite For Close Encounters!"

"Big Top...Big Shoes...Big Teeth!!"

"(from trailer) Killer Klowns From Outer Space...It's Crazy!"

"Grant Cramer - Mike Tobacco"

"Suzanne Snyder - Debbie Stone"

"John Allen Nelson - Dave Hanson"

"John Vernon - Curtis Mooney"

"Michael Siegel - Rich Terenzi"

"Peter Licassi - Paul Terenzi"

"Royal Dano - Farmer Gene Green"

"Christopher Titus - Bob McReed"

"Charles Chiodo - 'Klownzilla' the King Klown"