"I've never teamed two more unlikely prospects. You two go together like ice cream and whiskey. But I guess you'd be man and wife same as regular people, and nobody could say different."

"Bill Bixby - Russell Donovan"

"Harry Morgan - Homer McCoy"

"Susan Clark - Magnolia Dusty Clydesdale"

"You know something, Amos? The Lord poured your brains in with a teaspoon, and somebody joggled His arm. I keep trying to tell you we ain't got no lead to throw, and no powder to throw it with."

"Don Knotts - Theodore Ogelvie"

"John McGiver - Leonard Sharpe"

"Anytime you got one of them down-home sheriffs, you always got a town full of vigilantes."

"Kenny Endoso - Mexican policeman"

"Mario Cisneros - Puerto Vallarta policeman"

"Jeff Ramsey - The matador"

"Steve Boyum - Panama policeman"

"Don Knight - John Wintle"

"Tim Conway - Amos Tucker"

"John C. Meier - Ship's officer"

"Buddy Joe Hooker - Chef"

"Dolores Aguirre, Aurora Coria - General's daughters"

"Alex Tinne, Don Diamond - Locals"

"Wardes Donovan - Maitre d'"

"Alma Beltan - General's wife"

"Ernie Fuentos - Native"

"Antonio Trevino - Pigeon owner"

"Ray Victor - Guard attendant"

"Dante D'Andre - Dr. De Moraes"

"Iris Adrian - Loud American wife"

"Ceil Cabot - Mrs. Purkiss"

"Patricia Van Patten - Cigarette guest"

"David Wayne - Col. T.R. Clydesdale"

"Clay O'Brien - Bobby Bradley"

"Henry Slate - Off-watch officer"

"Jack Perkins - Loud American"

"Bert Santos - Policeman #3"

"José González González - Garage owner"

"Ruben Moreno - Store owner"