First Quote Added
April 10, 2026
Latest Quote Added
"I'm not a flower person"
"I'm not a champagne person"
"I'm not a sport person"
"I'm not a joke person"
"I'm not a 'testing things on animals' person"
"I'm not a goodbye person"
"I'm not an absurdity person"
"I'm not a commitment person"
"I'm a maturity person"
"I'm not a slogan person"
"Banana gin"
"Pineapple gin"
"Seventeen minutes late, water seeping through the cables at Effingham Junction - there was a lot of Effingham and a good deal of Blindingham!"
"Eleven minutes late, defective axle at Wandsworth."
"Twenty-two minutes late, black ice at Norbiton."
"Sensations in Triflesville"
"Generosityville, Arizona"
"Eleven minutes late, signal failure at Vauxhall."
"People who live in glass houses shouldn't cast beams into the moat"
"Eleven minutes late, staff shortages, Nine Elms."
"You've opened a whole new can of pots, calling the kettle by another name"
"A leopard never changes his spots twice in the same place"
"I feel like a fish out of water, but can't make him drink"
"Have I put the cat in the china shop?"
"We're putting the cart before the trees"
"So I'm sent to Birmingham?"
"We couldn't see the broth for the trees because of all the cooks"
"Eleven minutes late, staff difficulties, Hampton Wick."
"Eleven minutes late, defective junction box, New Malden."
"Eleven minutes late, overheated axle at Berrylands."
"Eleven minutes late, somebody had stolen the lines at Surbiton."
"Seventeen minutes late, defective bogey at Earlsfield."
"Twenty-two minutes late, obstacles on the line at Berrylands."
"Twenty-two minutes late, badger ate a junction box at New Malden."
"Twenty-two minutes late, escaped puma, Chessington North."
""Great!" (series 1&2)"
"Panic City"
"Rushed-off-our-feetsville"
"Cards-on-the-tablesville"
"Crudesville, Arizona"
"Titty City, Arizona"
"Aggression City, Arizona"
"Dullsville, Arizona"
"Bad News City, Arizona"
"I'm a fish person"
"I'm not a cricket person"
"I'm not a mystery person"
"I'm not a cork person"
"I'm not a pig person"
"I want the whole thing caught in the bud"