Film Directors From The United States

"One who never smiled, carried a face as still and sad as a daguerreotype through some of the most preposterously ingenious and visually satisfying comedy ever invented. That was Buster Keaton."

"Charlie Chaplin and I would have a friendly contest: Who could do the feature film with the least subtitles?"

"If one more person tells me this is just like old times, I swear I'll jump out the window."

"Our hero came from Nowhere — he wasn't going Anywhere and he got kicked off Somewhere."

"Marriage is fine as an institution, but bad as a habit."

"A picture without falls is as bad as Niagara in the same fix."

"The funny thing about our act is that dad gets the worst of it, although I'm the one who apparently receives the bruises … the secret is in landing limp and breaking the fall with a foot or a hand. It's a knack. I started so young that landing right is second nature with me. Several times I'd have been killed if I hadn't been able to land like a cat. Imitators of our act don't last long, because they can't stand the treatment."

"We used to get arrested every other week — that is, the old man would get arrested."

"What Keaton did physically, is actually quite startling when you discover that he did all of his own stunts… The famous one is when the house falls. He had to stand on a mark. I'm told it was a nail — if he moved an inch to one side he would have been crushed to death."

"Buster Keaton... will be around forever, because it's unlikely that human beings will ever go out-of-date the way special effects do. Keaton running and clambering onto a moving Civil War train in The General is infinitely more exciting than Christian Slater jumping from a helicopter onto a speeding locomotive in Broken Arrow because what Keaton does is real, and the camera captures and preserves his feats for posterity. In Broken Arrow we never see Slater (or the stuntman, for that matter) leaping from the helicopter to the train. Instead there are several cuts, and we must suspend our disbelief and assume that the feat has been accomplished. Which means that it's no feat at all."

"Maybe the trouble is that modern comics strive too hard to be sophisticated and knowing. What we've lost over the years is innocence and, as Keaton and company prove, innocence is an integral part of comedy."

"With his dark, sensitive looks, his face in repose evoking years of quiet contemplation, he resembled a mixture of Buddhist monk and fashion model. He offered the ideal face and acting style for motion pictures, proving less is more. He would become a master of knowing when to do nothing at all."

"Another 'great,' and I use that word very carefully, not the way Milton Berle uses it. One of the reasons I love Buster so much is because he lives comedy as well as practices it. Some of his things are better than Chaplin's."

"It's said that Chaplin wanted you to like him, but Keaton didn't care. I think he cared, but was too proud to ask. His films avoid the pathos and sentiment of the Chaplin pictures, and usually feature a jaunty young man who sees an objective and goes for it in the face of the most daunting obstacles. Buster survives tornados, waterfalls, avalanches of boulders, and falls from great heights, and never pauses to take a bow: He has his eye on his goal. And his movies, seen as a group, are like a sustained act of optimism in the face of adversity; surprising, how without asking, he earns our admiration and tenderness. Because he was funny, because he wore a porkpie had, Keaton's physical skills are often undervalued … no silent star did more dangerous stunts than Buster Keaton. Instead of using doubles, he himself doubled for his actors, doing their stunts as well as his own."

"He was doing stuff that was surreal."

"For me its Buster Keaton's face, with maybe his little hat on... It's being able to look into his eyes and see that sad face."

"There are moments in many of his movies that are just poetic... In doing silent movies, no one had done this yet!"

"I just want that one day, when I retire, that people still remember me like they remember Buster. I really want someone to respect me the way they respect Buster."

"What a creative genius — what an inventor… A guy like that, you just sit back and say, okay, I'll never get there!"

"I could tell you that those wonderful stories were 90% Buster's... I was often ashamed to take the money, much less the credit."

"It's the first movie I feel really proud of. But I know it's not a movie for everyone. Some people will embrace it, but some people will hate it, and I'm not really sure how to deal with that. In the past I've made movies that were pretty universally liked. You can't really hate them. You can discard them, but you can't really hate them."

"The stern dad stuff doesn't work anymore. You have to be level with the kids, you have to be a nice guy... The authority thing just doesn't work anymore. It's like directing a Chinese film vs. directing an American film. On a Chinese film you just give orders, no one questions you. Here, you have to convince people, you have to tell them why you want to do it a certain way, and they argue with you. Democracy."

"Gradually I got tuned into the world — that happens on every movie. I did a women's movie, and I'm not a woman. I did a gay movie, and I'm not gay. I learned as I went along."

"Mainstream films have occupied Hollywood but you can get bored very easily. It can be very repetitive and I think now we want something fresh and something inspiring and different, daring. The mainstream film is very expensive to make and it scares people. It's made for the worldwide audience, you have to please so many people, and the business men start running the movies rather than artists. This is back to the oldest way of Hollywood filmmaking, creating a fantasy, but it has been lost. It seems to take a foreign language film to recoup that ultimate movie viewing experience."

"Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha... Hello? This is your mother, are you there? Are you coming home?...Hello? Is anybody home? Well, you don't know me, but I know you And I've got a message to give to you And I said: okay, who is this really? And the voice said: This is the hand, the hand that takes...Neither snow nor rain nor gloom of night Shall stay these couriers from the swift completion Of their appointed rounds"

"Uh – this is your Captain again You know, I've got a funny feeling I've seen this all before Why? Cause, I'm a caveman Why? Cause, I've got eyes in the back of my head Why? It's the heat. Standby This is the time. And this is the record of the time"

"Golden cities. Golden towns And long cars, in long lines and great big signs And they all say: Hallelujah. Yodellayheehoo Every man for himself. Ooo coo coo Golden cities. Golden towns. Thanks for the ride Big Science. Hallelujah. Big Science. Yodellayheehoo"

"And you know the reason I really love the stars is that we cannot hurt them. We can't burn them or melt them or make them overflow. We can't flood them or blow them up or turn them out. But we are reaching for them. We are reaching for them."

"Good evening. This is your Captain We are about to attempt a crash landing... Place your tray tables in their upright, locked position Your Captain says: Put your head on your knees Your Captain says: Put your head in your hands... We are going down We are all going down, together... Standby."

"And he said: Now, I'm the Soul Doctor, and you know, language is a virus from outer space, and hearing your name is better than seeing your face."

"Paradise Is exactly like Where you are right now Only much much Better."

"She said, it looks Don't you think it looks a lot like rain? He said, isn't it? Isn't it just, isn't it just like a woman? She said, it's hard It's just hard, it's just kind of hard to say"

"Let X equal X You know, it could be you It's a sky-blue sky The satellites are out tonight Let X equal X...You know, I could write a book And this book would be thick enough to stun an ox 'cause I can see the future, and it's a place... Thanks for all the presents... Thanks for introducing me to the Chief"

"Cop couldn't find his fucking couch, the living room."

"Society functions in a way much more interesting than the multiple-choice pattern we have been rewarded for succeeding at in school. Success in life comes not from the ability to choose between the four presented answers, but from the rather more difficult and painfully acquired ability to formulate the questions. Page 28"

"The good causes of the Left may generally be compared to NASCAR; they offer the diversion of watching things go excitingly around in a circle, getting nowhere. Page 11."

"A society can neither advance nor improve without excess of disposable income. This excess can only be amassed through the productions of goods and services necessary or attractive to the mass. A financial system which allows this leads to inequality; one that does not leads to mass starvation. Page 10."

"The goal of the Left is a government-run country and that of the Right the freedom of the individual from government. Page 236."

"Where have you been, Shelly? Bruce and Harriet Nyborg. Do you want to see the memos...? They're nuts... they used to call in every week [...] Did you see how they were living? [...] The people are insane. They just like talking to salesmen."

"A man should BE his job. You are FUCKED at yours."

"April to September it's me, it's no fucking Moss! Due respect... he's an order taker. Talks... oh, talks a good game. But look at the board, and it's me John. It's me."

"You are a shithead, Williamson. If you can't think on your feet you oughta keep your mouth shut."

"I point back in the living room, back to the sideboard. I didn't fucking know there was a sideboard there!"

"Get the chalk! Get the fucking chalk! Put me on the board! Put me on the Cadillac board! Williamson! Pick up the fucking chalk! Hey, Rick I closed em! I closed the cocksucker!"

"What the hell are you? You're a fuckin' secretary. Fuck you. That's my message to ya: fuck you and kiss my ass, and if you don't like it baby I'm going across the street to Jerry Graff, period, fuck you. Now, I want you to put me on the cadillac board and I want two promising leads and I don't want any bullshit and I want them close together because I am going to close them all, and that is all I have to say to you! [flips him off]"

"That's fucked. That's fucked. You don't look at the fucking percentage. You look at the gross."

"Well, to the law, you’re an accessory. Before the fact."

"Cop couldn't find his dick, two hands and a map."

"Fuck the machine? FUCK THE MACHINE! What is this, courtesy class? You're fucked, Rick."

"Anybody that talks to this asshole is a fuckin' asshole."