"I want you to know... this is really difficult for me as well. You killed my family, you killed my community, you killed my co-workers and you killed the bees. So given that, you should really appreciate how professional I'm being by not gutting you."

"Emma Stone - Michelle Fuller"

"Is a big tough guy like you scared of a sweet little thing like me. What do you think, Maddy? Do you think I hurt Mr. Tiny Peepee's little feelings? Oh, are you gonna cry, Terry? Huh? Are you gonna cry? [Terry punches her in the face]"

"I'm not going to say you have a small dick, Terry, 'cause that would just be predictable. I mean, it's not big, and that's fine, but for the sake of the puppies, I just want to make sure you know how to use it. Three people in my seventeen years have made me come. Myself of course. This really sweet boy at camp the summer after freshman year. Lovely fingers on that boy. And then, not ten minutes ago, I got my frigging socks rocked off... by Maddy. But never by you, Terry."

"God, I'm freaking starving, Larry!"

"[Upon being resurrected from her grave by Leena's sorcery stones] Leena!"

"After that, I track down Terry and, um... blue up his balls. God, Terry charges my bones. For real. [Scene of Terry groping her rear end in hallway] Next year, he's captain of the football team and... I'm captain of the squad, so it's pretty much gonna be the best year ever. MMS class. I avoid taking honors classes, so I can maintain all A's. Overheard that from a senior bitch, freshmen year. Take basic classes, show up on time and always look hot!"

"[In Martha Popkin's body, on phone] Hey, Dad. Me and the bitches, the girls, um, we are going to be staying at Maddy's house tonight, because we have a whole lot of cheers that we have to go over and practice and everything. So, I guess we'll be seeing you tomorrow. Uh, don't work too hard. We love you. Okay, bye, Dad. Bye."

"[Drinking milk from jug at Larry's residence] The bitches think I'm crazy, but, I drink like half a gallon a day."

"[When asked By Maddy why she cheerleads] 'Cause it's dangerous. This is the most dangerous sport in American high school, bitch. More catastrophic injuries per student."

"[A boy comes up to Alexis hugging and kissing her] Oh, Marvin. And diplomatic. Proactive. Seriously, hon. Come to the realm, boys! [Jerks her torso back and forth] My bitches do not disappoint."

"[Turns around with both hands effeminately raised] Blackfoot Bloodhounds, yo. [Holds out upturned left hand] Boys be dogs, [Holds out upturned right hand] girls be bitches. Gangster. [Flips both hands, turns and walks away]"

"Clear the road puppies. Bloodhound bitches in the house y'all."

"[In Hanna's body] I crashed us and now, God is punishing me."

"Brandon Hampton as Football Player"

"Jesse Hlubik as Coach Bantari"

"Reanin Johannink as Martha Popkin"

"Michael Bowen as Larry"

"Nadia Boceski as Kayle"

"Shane Bowen as Rock"

"Sam Bean as Moochie"

"Nicholas Bloom as Nicholas"

"Brooke Butler as Tracy Bingham"

"Revenge is a bitch."

"They're young. They're beautiful. They're back from the dead."

"Sidney Allison as Taylor"

"Wow, Hanna. Didn't know you had tits."

"If she's a dog. She must have six more hidden somewhere, dude."

"Shay Astar as Ms. Wolf"

"Amanda Grace Cooper as Hanna Popkin"

"I'm sorry, Larry. I think, my friends are hungry. [They proceed to suck the life juice out of him]"

"So, there's two things you gotta know about George's van. One, there's always a weed stash. And two, it's never locked. And three, it smells like dick."

"You're not leaving me... I won't let you... G...O...! [Gives a banshee scream]"

"[After cutting stones out of Hannah and then swallowing the magic stones] Mmm. Taste's like jelly beans. I'm like the cookie monster up in this bitch. Oh, I hope that shit was gluten-free!"

"[Running after cheerleaders in forest] I don't know but I've been told! Killing pussies, going home!"

"That voodoo dyke and her bitches are picking us dogs off. One by one. Bitches glowing like Lite-Brites and shit. You saw it."

"[When asking Alexis why she cheerleads when its dangerous] Like you can sprain a tit or something."

"[Referring to Mäddy] I never understood why you had the hots for her, Viky. Till I fucked her, this summer. She puts up a good fight!"

"[Runs into Vik after he quits to coaches, knocking him down] You think I'm gonna let you quit?!"

"[To Vik] I'm your best friend, bud! I broke her in for you and everything!"

"[Laughing at Vik who is tricked By Maddy into getting his blood sucked out] Oh, you are such a little bitch, Vik. I owe it to you, too, cuz. [Hoists Hannah's body on his shoulder] You want her? Come and get her. You girls got your seatbelts on?! [Laughs maniacally and drives away]"