Singers From England

"It was a strange life, I suppose, but it was the only one I’ve ever known. What is a normal childhood anyway?"

"I had almost no education. I hardly went to school. I’d be away for weeks doing films, then I’d come back and have no idea what they were talking about. Of course the other kids loved it: ‘You may be a well-known star but you don’t know how to do algebra.’ It was a nightmare."

"I did all my real growing up in France, which I was almost not allowed to do at home. They liked my voice, they found me sexy, they didn't know anything about my childhood. In England, you’d come on to a bright cheerful song, do a bit of comedy, finish on a big ballad and wear a sparkly dress. That was about it. Suddenly I saw people like Aznavour and Piaf, songs coming from your heart, your soul, your guts, your sex, whatever, songs about everything, life and death, love and hate, wow! I realised you can use all of you when you perform."

"I was with Karen Carpenter in Vegas. We were invited to Elvis's dressing room and I had to drag her away. She was such a sweet girl but I could see what was going on. I met him a few times after that, and he flirted very heavily with me. I was supposed to do a movie with him and that was stopped right away by my husband!"

"I am not really a reminiscing type person. I am not nostalgic at all."

"It always makes me laugh when people ask why anyone would want to do a sitcom in America. If it runs five years, you never have to work again."

"I'd never malign another performer, but the style is not good enough. They've done away with laugh pay-offs. We were given nine minutes or eight minutes. Now they wander wherever they like, they don't get to any jokes before they've been on for two minutes. We had to make an impact in ten seconds."

"I wanna tell you a story"

"My outlook is that life is like a self-service restaurant and you have to help yourself. Sometimes when you see what the other fella has got, you want some of it too."

"Now my sister's daughter, Elizabeth May Is going to get married next Sunday, they say Now what will I buy her? She's such a nice girl. I think a piano will do very well. I saw one today, 'twas a beauty I found. Only ninety-five guineas. I'll have it sent round."

"'Sam, Sam, pick oop tha' musket' The Duke said as quiet as could be, 'Sam, Sam Sam Sam, pick oop tha' musket, Coom on lad, just to please me"

"And yet I don't know. And yet I don't know! The sewing machine that cost me twenty guineas or so. And that would buy plenty of linen and thread And things that are hand-made are best, so it's said. It's not that I'm mingy - although I'm half Scotch. I know what I'll buy her. A Ingersoll watch."

"Up rode the Duke on a loverly white 'orse, To find out the cause of the bother, He looked at the musket and then at Old Sam, And he talked to Old Sam like a brother"

"The same thing occurred when the Major and Colonel Both tried to get Sam to see sense, But when Old Duke o' Wellington came into view Well, then the excitement was tense"

"'Alright Duke,' said Old Sam, 'just for thee I'll oblige, And to show thee I meant no offence', So Sam picked it up, 'Gradely, lad' said the Duke, 'Right-o boys... let battle commence.'"

"And yet I don't know. And yet I don't know! The handkerchiefs that cost me three shillings or so - And that seems a lot for poor Uncle John And anything goes to blow noses on. Talking of noses, hers is red enough. I know what I'll buy her. A nice powder puff. Now she can't powder her nose with a grand piano. Nor yet with a sewing machine. She can't powder her nose with an Ingersoll watch - Well that's silly, you know what I mean. She can't powder her nose with a jumper. She'll find that a little bit rough. So I'll pop round to Woolworth's tomorrow, God bless her And buy her a nice powder puff. And yet I don't know. And yet I don't know! Sixpence ha'pennies aren't found in back yards. I'll not buy her a powder puff at all - no. I'll just send her my kindest regards."

"'Sam, Sam, pick oop tha' musket,' Lieutenant exclaimed with some 'eat, Sam said, 'he knocked it down, reason he picks it oop, Or it stays where it is, at me feet'"

"The sound of 'igh words very soon reached the ears of an officer, Lieutenant Bird, Who said to the Sergeant, 'Now what's all this here?' And the Sergeant told what had occurred."

"It caused quite a stir when the Captain arrived To ‘find out the cause of the trouble’ And every man there, all excepting Old Sam, Was full of excitement and bubble."

"'Pick it oop' said the Sergeant, abrupt-like, but cool, But Sam with the shake of his head, Being that thou knocked it out of me 'and, Let thou pick the thing up, instead"

"'Sam, Sam, pick oop tha' musket,' The Sergeant exclaimed with a roar, Sam said 'Tha' knocked it doon, reason tha'll pick it oop, Or it stays where it is on't floor"

"'Sam, Sam, pick oop the musket,' Said Captain, for strictness renowned. Sam said 'He knocked it doon, reason he picks it oop, or it stays where it is, on the ground.'"

"It occurred on the evening before Waterloo, And troops were lined up on parade, The Sergeant inspecting 'em he was a terror, Of whom every man was afraid"

"All excepting one man who was in the front rank, A man by the name of Sam Small, And 'im and the Sergeant were both 'daggers drawn', They thought 'nowt' of each other at all"

"As Sergeant walks past he was swinging his arms, And he happened to brush against Sam, And knocking his musket clean out of his hand, It fell to the ground with a slam"

"My knees started knocking, I did feel so sad. Then Brown said, "Don't die in a pub, it looks bad," He said, "Come with me, I'll show you what to do. Now I've got a friend who'll be useful to you." He led me to Black's Undertaking Depot, And Black, with some crepe round his hat said, "Hello, My word you do look queer!""

"I crawled in the street and I murmured,"I'm done." Then up came Old Jenkins and shouted,"Oh son!" "My word you do look well! My word you do look well! You're looking fine and in the pink!" I shouted, "Am I? Come and have a drink! You've put new life in me, I'm sounder than a bell. By gad! There's life in the old dog yet. My word I do feel well!""

"I've been very poorly but now I feel prime, I've been out today for the very first time. I felt like a lad as I walked down the road, Then I met Old Jones and he said, "Well I'm blowed! My word you do look queer! My word you do look queer! Oh, dear! You look dreadful: you've had a near shave, You look like a man with one foot in the grave." I said, "Bosh! l'm better; it's true I've been ill." He said, "I'm delighted you're better, but still, I wish you'd a thousand for me in your will. My word, you do look queer!""

"The exciting thing about seeing a new show is that you are taken on a journey of surprises, if you know what’s coming it takes away the fun."

"That's what show business is—sincere insincerity."

"Holmes is the hardest part I have ever played - harder than Hamlet or Macbeth. Holmes has become the dark side of the moon for me. He is moody and solitary and underneath I am really sociable and gregarious. It has all got too dangerous."

"Trying to be Sherlock Holmes is like trying to catch an arrow in mid-flight."

"Yet, like so many of the D'Oyly Carte principals, he makes up in enthusiasm what he lacks in vocal prowess."

"I do not subscribe to the theory that when a popular member of the company leaves, it is the end of the world — that things will never be the same again. Of course they won't, for each artist leaves something of himself or herself in a role."

"It's a long way to Tipperary, It's a long way to go. It's a long way to Tipperary, To the sweetest girl I know! Goodbye Piccadilly, Farewell Leicester Square! It's a long long way to Tipperary, But my heart's right there."

"Look at the children, bloomin' excited, Ain't it grand to be bloomin' well dead! Look at the neighbours, bloomin' delighted, Ain't it grand to be bloomin' well dead!"

"The way you’re perceived is regal On the televisions by the people You don’t fool us: we know you’re evil And your face should be illegal"

"Another John Doe and we all become the same yeah Another John Doe and a another face to blame yeah"

"How many falling stars does it take to wake a nation? And trample through your head and lay your mind out on the pavement Confusing and consuming all in all it complicates me."

"I don't deny-a what I'm seeing You vilified all our kind You criticize people's weakness When all the time it's just your lies"

"That’s a nice little flip camera you got there? They’re good those."

"I wrote that; I ran right outside I hopped inside a cab. I went out the other door. You know like the Beatles, when they go in one side and then get out the other side and everyone thinks they’re in the cab and they’re not. And this Englishman said fab. That was Bob Dylan’s 115th Dream, you know the one. If you’re a musician, people expect your music to be free. It’s like is all plumbing free? Is all electricity free? Is all dentistry free? No."

"But no matter what they say, You can make it all right You can do it alone now Do it your way Yeah"

"When talking about what his Father was doing at the age of 23 I said to him last year, or the year before, ‘Yeah, well…something…something.’ You know, I’d done my degree and I was like ‘You know, well, I’ve got a degree…you know, I’m this age.’ and he, he, laughed and he was just like ‘What was I doing when I was 23?’ and I said, ‘Dunno’ and he was like, ‘What was I doing?...Oh yeah, Sgt. Pepper.’ and I was just instantly just like oh."

"The world continues to dissolve It’s sad how we just keep devolving And the smaller it all goes All the stranger it’s becoming"

"They choose what you’re watching and you don’t mind They choose what you’re watching ‘cause they’re so kind They choose what you’re watching and you don’t mind Dunno what you’re watching and you don’t mind"

"(on her marriage to Andrew Lloyd Webber) It was such a creative time. Everything was happening very fast. He was writing, I was singing. He was inspired, and I was inspired. I didn't really have time to think about it. I didn't really have time to read things about it, either. I got a sense of things, which made me quite nervous at times. But, no, we were running all the time then, doing things. It was fun, but also a lot of pressure."

"I'm a very talented person, I know that. I'm a very gifted person. I have a lot of imagination. I work hard. I feel I have the attributes within myself to have achieved what I have done. There has been no luck, no miracles. The only miracle has been this voice."

"I don't know who my audience is. People have said there is an integrity about me, and I think there is. I don't try to follow a trend. I have my own little path, and although I delve into things, I stay with what I am. I'm quite natural with it. Maybe people feel comfortable with that and they trust it, so they buy it. They'll come and see me in concert. I think I always do a good job in that area."

"In the past, I always used to be looking for answers. Today, I know there are only questions. So I just live."