"(Sleep-talking) I'll kill you, Leonard Nimoy."

"(Playing with Dale's drumset, as he yells in one of the drums) FUCK YOU, DALE! FUCK YOU!!"

"(At Derek's birthday gathering, during his and Dale's presentation of Prestige Worldwide) Last week, we put Liquid Pa…"

"(Wearing a Nazi outfit, to some home buyers) Hey, fuckers! Welcome to the neighborhood! My name is Craig. If you guys…"

"(In regards to Robert and Nancy, who are retiring, selling their residence and having him and Dale live on their own …"

"(After singing for Dale, upon his request) I felt like I was hovering over my own body, watching myself sing."

"(On Christmas Day, regarding his Chewbacca mask) It's okay that mine's not movie quality."

"Will Ferrell as Brennan Huff"

"John C. Reilly as Dale Doback"

"Richard Jenkins as Robert Doback"