"You stupid, ignorant, son of a bitch, dumb bastard! Jesus Christ, I met some dumb bastards in time, but you outdo the…"

"[running gag whenever he's ejected from the train in any manner] Son of a bitch!"

"[to George] That's bad, man! You're lookin' good! Now here, take this radio. When you step out of here, step out like…"

"By plane, by train, by the edge of your seat, it's the most hilarious suspense ride of your life!"

"Nothing can stop the Silver Streak"

"Gene Wilder - George Caldwell"

"Jill Clayburgh - Hilly Burns"

"Richard Pryor - Grover Muldoon"

"Patrick McGoohan - Roger Devereau"

"Ned Beatty - Bob Sweet"