"We were talking briefly about cocaine...yeah. Anything that makes you paranoid and impotent, give me more of that!"

"I would like to do for you now, a Japanese science fiction movie: "Attack of the Killer Vibrators.""

"Before I go on, I want to ask if there are any Hell's Angels here tonight? [no response] … Those pussy-whipped faggots!"

"I would like to do Shakespeare's only unknown piece, That's the Way I Lick It ... It's a bleak night my Lord. Look! T…"

"You're only given a little spark of madness and if you lose that, you're nothin'."

"Death is nature's way of saying, "Your table is ready.""

"Parry is a man with a previous life that was so damaged that he had to create another personality. … It's like post-t…"

"Comedy can be a cathartic way to deal with personal trauma."

"I'd like to start the show by showing you something I'm very proud of. You'll have to step back though."

"[spoofing Mister Rogers] It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood... oh, damn, someone stole my sneakers. Let's do so…"