"I've never thought of PHP as more than a simple tool to solve problems."

"PHP is rarely the bottleneck."

"Ugly problems often require ugly solutions. Solving an ugly problem in a pure manner is bloody hard."

"PHP is just a hammer. Nobody has ever gotten rich making hammers."

"Back when PHP had less than 100 functions and the function hashing mechanism was strlen()."

"If eval() is the answer, you're almost certainly asking the wrong question."

"PHP 8 is significantly better because it contains a lot less of my code."

"I did not develop the PHP we know today. Dozens, if not hundreds of people, developed PHP. I was simply the first dev…"

"I actually hate programming, but I love solving problems."

"I really don't like programming. I built this tool to program less so that I could just reuse code."