"When Mr. Thornton had left the house that morning he was almost blinded by his baffled passion. He was as dizzy as if Margaret, instead of looking, and speaking, and moving like a tender graceful woman, had been a sturdy fish-wife, and given him a sound blow with her fists. He had positive bodily pain,--a violent headache, and a throbbing intermittent pulse. He could not bear the noise, the garish light, the continued rumble and movement of the street. He called himself a fool for suffering so; and yet he could not, at the moment, recollect the cause of his suffering, and whether it was adequate to the consequences it had produced. It would have been a relief to him, if he could have sat down and cried on a door-step by a little child, who was raging and storming, through his passionate tears, at some injury he had received. He said to himself, that he hated Margaret, but a wild, sharp sensation of love cleft his dull, thunderous feeling like lightning, even as he shaped the words expressive of hatred. His greatest comfort was in hugging his torment; and in feeling, as he had indeed said to her, that though she might despise him, contemn him, treat him with her proud sovereign indifference, he did not change one whit. She could not make him change. He loved her, and would love her; and defy her, and this miserable bodily pain. He stood still for a moment, to make this resolution firm and clear. There was an omnibus passing--going into the country; the conductor thought he was wishing for a place, and stopped near the pavement. It was too much trouble to apologise and explain; so he mounted upon it, and was borne away,--past long rows of houses--then past detached villas with trim gardens, till they came to real country hedge-rows, and, by-and-by, to a small country town. Then every body got down; and so did Mr. Thornton, and because they walked away he did so too. He went into the fields, walking briskly, because the sharp motion relieved his mind. He could remember all about it now; the pitiful figure he must have cut; the absurd way in which he had gone and done the very thing he had so often agreed with himself in thinking would be the most foolish thing in the world; and had met with exactly the consequences which, in these wise moods, he had always fore-told were certain to follow, if he ever did make such a fool of himself. Was he bewitched by those beautiful eyes, that soft, half-open, sighing mouth which lay so close upon his shoulder only yesterday? He could not even shake off the recollection that she had been there; that her arms had been round him, once--if never again. He only caught glimpses of her; he did not understand her altogether. At one time she was so brave, and at another so timid; now so tender, and then so haughty and regal-proud. And then he thought over every time he had ever seen her once again, by way of finally forgetting her. He saw her in every dress, in every mood, and did not know which became her best. Even this morning, how magnificent she had looked,--her eyes flashing out upon him at the idea that, because she had shared his danger yesterday, she had cared for him the least! If Mr. Thornton was a fool in the morning, as he assured himself at least twenty times he was, he did not grow much wiser in the afternoon. All that he gained in return for his sixpenny omnibus ride, was a more vivid conviction that there never was, never could be, any one like Margaret; that she did not love him and never would; but that she--no! nor the whole world--should never hinder him from loving her. And so he returned to the little market-place, and remounted the omnibus to return to Milton."
Quote Details
Added by wikiquote-import-bot
Unverified quote
0 likes
Original Language: English
Available Languages (1)
Sources
pg. 204-205
https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/North_and_South_(Gaskell_novel)
Revision History
No revisions have been submitted for this quote.
Categories
North and South (Gaskell novel)
30 quotes on TrueQuotesView all quotes by North and South (Gaskell novel) →
Related Quotes
"Yes; the fools will have a strike. Let them. It suits us well enough. But we give them a chance. They think trade is …"
"Bessy stilled her rocking to gaze after her [Margaret Hale] "I wonder if there are many folk like her down South. She…"
"'Mother,'said he [John Thornton], stopping, and bravely speaking out the truth, 'I wish you would try and like Miss H…"
"He [John Thornton] shook hands with Margaret. He knew it was the first time their hands had met, though she was perfe…"
"Margaret's attention was called to her host; his whole manner, as master of the house, and entertainer of his friends…"
"'Mother--mother!' cried he; 'Come down--they are gone, and Miss Hale is hurt!' He bore her into the dining-room, and …"
"'I don't believe it,' said Fanny. 'I know she cares for my brother; any one can see that; and I dare say, she'd give …"
"'A girl in love will do a good deal,' replied Mrs. Thornton, shortly."
"Mr. Thornton remained in the dining-room, trying to think of the business he had to do at the police-office, and in r…"
""Margaret opened the door and went in the straight, fearless, dignified presence habitual to her. She felt no awkward…"