"Even if you're married to the president, you can't get a few minutes alone."

"You went in Buckingham Palace and all you came out with was an old piece of wood?"

"[looking over the edge of the tilting platform] I see death and despair. Mostly death, maybe despair for the last few…"

"Ben, if it was you trying to convince me, you’d have less evidence and I'd already believe you."

"Did none of you read my book?"

"There's my tax dollars at work coming to arrest me."

"Look! It's a little golden man, like a tiny torso. Wow..."

"Tea time, chaps!"

"[after setting off the Buckingham Palace fire alarms] Uh-oh, God save the Queen!"

"[after discussing that they are going to kidnap the President] Wouldn't it be easier just to make an appointment? (th…"