"Frankly, despite my distaste of the press, I'd love to rise from the grave every ten years or so and go buy a few new…"

"Thank God I'm an atheist."

"Age is something that doesn't matter, unless you are a cheese you dingus"

"If someone were to prove to me- right this minute- that God, in all his luminescence, exists, it wouldn't change a si…"

"If you were to ask me if I'd ever had the bad luck to miss my daily cocktail, I'd have to say that I doubt it; where …"

"In the name of Hippocrates, doctors have invented the most exquisite form of torture ever known to man: survival."

"Salvador Dali seduced many ladies, particularly American ladies, but these seductions usually consisted of stripping …"

"Like the majority of deaf people, I don't like blind people much."

"I like go to bed and get up early; in that, I am anti-Spanish."

"A paranoiac is like a poet, born, not made. (Un paranoico como un poeta, nace, no se hace)"