"A person could piss against a tree, he could piss on his mother, he could piss on his own breeches, and get off, but …"

"The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glo…"

"Man is a marvelous curiosity. When he is at his very, very best he is a sort of low grade nickel-plated angel; at his…"

"[Man] has imagined a heaven, and has left entirely out of it the supremest of all his delights, the one ecstasy that …"

"It is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some …"

"Life was not a valuable gift, but death was. Life was a fever-dream made up of joys embittered by sorrows, pleasure p…"

"We are strangely made. We think we are wonderful creatures. Part of the time we think that, at any rate. And during t…"

"Man seems to be a rickety poor sort of a thing, any way you take him; a kind of British Museum of infirmities and inf…"

"Man is the only animal that deals in that atrocity of atrocities, War. He is the only one that gathers his brethren a…"

"Man is the only Patriot. He sets himself apart in his own country, under his own flag, and sneers at the other nation…"