"Courting, in the sense in which we use the word, is distinctly an American custom. The social laws of other civilized countries are such as to preclude the possibility of the almost unrestrained association of the sexes in youth which we see in this country. We do not offer this fact as an argument in favor of foreign social customs, by any means, although in this one particular they often present great advantages, since in the majority of instances other evils as great or even greater are encouraged. We mention the fact simply for the purpose of bringing into bold relief the evils of the characteristic American looseness in this particular. A French matron would be horrified at the idea of a young man asking her daughter to accompany him alone on an evening ride to a lecture, concert, or other place of amusement, and much more should he ask the privilege of sitting up all night in the parlor with the light turned down, after the rest of the family had retired. Among respectable people in France such liberties are not tolerated; and a young man who should propose such things would be dismissed from the house instantly, and would be regarded as unfit for association with virtuous people. If a young man calls upon a young lady for the purpose of making her acquaintance, he sees both her and her mother, or an aunt or older sister. He never sees her alone. If he invited her to ride, or to accompany him to an entertainment of any sort, he must always invite her lady friend also; she goes along at any rate. There is afforded no chance for solitary moonlight strolls or rides, nor any other of the similar opportunities made so common by American courting customs. We are no advocates of the formal modes of contracting matrimonial alliances common among many nations, and illustrations of which we find at all ages of the world. For example, among the ancient Assyrians it was a custom to sell wives to the highest bidder, at auction, the sums received for the handsomer one being given to the less favored ones as a dowry, to secure a husband for every woman. The same custom prevailed in Babylon in ancient times, and has been practiced in modern times in Russia. At St. Petersburg, not many years ago, an annual sale of wives was held on Whit Sunday, after the same plan followed by the Assyrians. Among the early Jews it seems to have been the custom for parents to select wives for their sons. In the case of Isaac, this important matter was intrusted to an old and experienced servant, who was undoubtedly considered much more competent to select a wife for the young man than he was himself. The same custom has been handed down even to the present time among some oriental nations. In many cases the parties are not allowed to see each other until after the wedding ceremony is completed. The Hungarians often betroth their children while they are yet in their cradles, as did the Mexicans and Brazilians of the last century. In some countries it has even been customary to betroth girls conditionally before they were born. The primitive Moravians seem to have adhered to the ancient Jewish custom in some degree, though making the selection of a wife a matter of chance. The old people did all the courting there was done, which was not much. When a young man desired a wife, a helpmeet was selected for him by casting lots among the marriageable young ladies of the community, and the young man was obliged to abide by the decision, it being supposed that Providence controlled the selection. We are not prepared to say that the young man ran any greater risk of getting an uncongenial or undesirable life companion by this mode of selection than by the more modern modes in vogue among us. As before remarked, we do not represent these customs as illustrations of what might be considered a proper mode of conducting the preliminary steps of matrimonial alliances. On the contrary, we unhesitatingly pronounce them decidedly objectionable on moral grounds if not on others, and we can readily see that such inions must have been in many cases exceedingly unsatisfactory."
Quote Details
Added by wikiquote-import-bot
Unverified quote
0 likes
Activists from the United StatesBusinesspeople from the United StatesInventorsHealth activistsPhysicians from Michigan
Original Language: English
Available Languages (1)
Sources
pp.136-139
https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/John_Harvey_Kellogg
Revision History
No revisions have been submitted for this quote.
Categories
John Harvey Kellogg
(February 26, 1852 – December 14, 1943) was an American medical doctor in , who ran a sanitarium using holistic methods, with a particular focus on , s, and exercise. Kellogg was an advocate of vegetarianism for health and is best known for the invention of the known as with his brother, . He led in the establishment of the .
170 quotes on TrueQuotesView all quotes by John Harvey Kellogg →
Related Quotes
"All the bloodshed caused by the warlike disposition of Napoleon is as nothing compared to the myriads of persons who …"
"The sin of self-pollution is one of the vilest, the basest, and the most degrading that a human being can commit. It …"
"1. From seven to nine hours’ sleep are required by all persons. The rule should be, Retire early and sleep until rest…"
"A daily bath is indispensable to health under almost all circumstances ; for patients of this lass, it is especially …"
"Marriage.-Another class of practitioners, with more apparent regard for morality, recommend matrimony as the sure pan…"
"Drugs, Rings, etc.-If drugs, “per se”, will cure invalids of any class, they are certainly worthless in this class of…"
"Can Dreams Be Controlled?-Facts prove that they can be, and to a remarkable extent. A large share of emissions occur …"
"Dreams.-This is a subject of much interest to those suffering from nocturnal pollutions, for these occurrences are al…"
"A still greater control is exerted over the thoughts during seep by their character during hours of wakefulness. By c…"
"Said a leading physician in New York to us when interrogated as to his special treatment off spermatorrhoea, “When a …"