"Hell is other people's babies. That's the lesson I learned when I ventured to the Eighth Annual America's Most Beauti…"

"I'm stunned. Is this a trick to steal my shoes? Thirty-year carnie vet Wayne-o is offering me, me, a corn dog. I thin…"

"Looking at the time, I can't believe the irony. Expecting a huge reaction, I announce, “Hey everyone, it's 4:20!” No …"

"Closer to showtime, the jovial crowd now arrives in droves. Laughing. Smiling. Until they hear the melodic sounds of …"

"He was a horse of goodly countenance, rather expressive of vigilance than fire; though an unnatural appearance of fie…"

"In the younger days of the Republic there lived in the county of —— two men, who were admitted on all hands to be the…"

"It is said that a hundred gamecocks will live in perfect harmony together it you do not put a hen with them; and so i…"

"All the knowing ones were consulted as to the issue, and they all agreed, to a man, in one of two opinions: either th…"

"Language cannot describe the scene that followed; the shouts, oaths, frantic gestures, taunts, replies, and little fi…"

"For we Americans, though we are the most restless race in the world, with the possible exception of the Bedouins, alm…"