"I was going to thrash them within an inch of their lives, but I didn't have a tape measure."

"Lulubelle, it's you! I didn't recognize you standing up."

"Time wounds all heels."

"There's something corrupt going on around my pants but I just can't seem to locate it."

"You must fan the flames of love with the bellows of indifference."

"I'm not in business for love, you know. I was in love once and I got the business."

"I'm not drunk, but, what's the ceiling doing on the floor?"

"Rusty, I no like-a the West. All-a the people do is kill each other. I like-a the West better if it was in the East. …"

"[to Quale] You said you was an embezzler, but, you no fool me. I knew you was a crook!"

"Any resemblance between these two characters and living persons is purely accidental!"