"When my grandfather found out that the Japanese had surrendered, he was lost. He didn't know what to do with himself.…"

"You're one of the leaders of the party now, Sarah. Don't get co-opted by Limbaugh and the other extremists. They'll d…"

"I am raising millions of dollars for this campaign; hundreds of thousands of people are coming to see me speak! Not J…"

"I'm trying to trust you people, but you're making it really hard for me!"

"I AM RUINED IN ALASKA! [hurls flip phone]"

"There are unknowns with Palin, and ah, certainly it could go bad. But if it were me, I'd rather lose by ten points go…"

"Governor, this country has just elected the first African-American President in the history of its existence, and it …"

"Julianne Moore - Sarah Palin"

"Woody Harrelson - Steve Schmidt"

"[While watching one of Barack Obama's speeches] If he heals a sick baby, we're really fucked."