"The causes for the continual difference in taste of the dish are unclear. They have not been determined to this day, in part because the investigators usually lean back sluggishly, burp quietly, think a bit, and silently reach out with their soup dish for seconds. After that, there is sex and sleep. Sex after a couple of bowls of borsch is particularly good. Sleep with a borsch aftertaste in the mouth is also sweet. It is because of this that investigators cannot finish researching the delights of the flavor varieties of borsch – the flavors are infinite. In the course of my life I have cooked borsch more than one thousand times, each one tasting different."