"[singing] Oh I come from a land from a faraway place / Where the caravan camels roam / Where it's flat and immense and the heat is intense (soundtrack version: Where they cut off your ear if they don't like your face) / It's barbaric, but hey...it's home! / When the wind's from the east / And the sun's from the west / And the sand in the glass is right / Come on down, stop on by / Hop a carpet and fly / To another Arabian night! / Arabian nights / Like Arabian days / More often than not / Are hotter than hot / In a lot of good ways / Arabian nights / 'Neath Arabian moons / A fool off his guard / Could fall-and-fall hard / Out there on the dunes. [first lines] Ah, salaam and good evening to you worthy friend. Please, please, come closer... [camera pushes in on his face squishing it] Ah uh, too close, a little too close. [Camera pulls out] There. Welcome to Agrabah. City of mystery, of enchantment, [pulls a bag off of the camel and unrolls it to reveal a merchant's stand] and the finest merchandise this side of the river Jordan, on sale today, come on down! [chuckles] Look at this! Yes! Combination hookah and coffee maker, also makes Julienne fries. Will not break, will not... [breaks apart] it broke. [toss it away] Ooh! Look at this! I have never seen one of these intact before. This is the famous Dead Sea Tupperware. Listen. [lifts cover slightly and blows a raspberry] Ah, still good. [the camera pans to the right] Wait, don't go! I can see that you're only interested in the exceptionally rare. I think then, you would be most rewarded to consider...this. [pulls out an oil lamp] Do not be fooled by its commonplace appearance. Like so many things, it is not what is outside, but what is inside that counts. This is no ordinary lamp! It once changed the course of a young man's life. A young man who liked this lamp was more than what he seemed: a diamond in the rough. Perhaps you would like to hear the tale? [pours sand from the lamp into his hand, and throws it into the air which form into stars which transition into the next scene] It begins on a dark night, where a dark man waits, with a dark purpose."