The Other Guys

"How do they walk away in movies when it explodes behind them? There's no way! I call bullshit on that. When they flew the Millennium Falcon out of the Death Star and it was followed by the explosion, that was bullshit!"

"I never actually put my foot all the way down to the ground with the accelerator like that. It got me slightly aroused."

"[in a ballet school] I think we all experienced our own ballet today. A ballet of emotion, and feelings."

"[while interrogating Ershon] I'm gonna make you eat a plate of human shit!"

"You turned my beautiful Prius into a nightmare!"

"Gator needs his gat, you punk-ass BITCH!"

"Captain, you really want to disarm this guy? Take out the batteries in the calculator."

"I'm a peacock, you gotta let me fly!"

"And when I come back and bust your ass, we are locking David Ershon in the Federal Reserve!"

"[while showing badge] Police, shithead!"

"Did someone call nine one HOLY SHIT?!"

"All the gun fights, all the car chases, all the sex we don't want to have with women but we have to...is all due to what you guys do. Thank you."

"Ay, ay, ay! Ay, you shut your face! If we wanna hear you talk, I will shove my arm up your ass and work your mouth like a puppet! You hear me?! You hear me?! Cast off!"

"[while flying in a car through the air towards several drug runners who are firing machine guns at him as he returns fire with a pistol in each hand] You have the right...to remain...SILENT...but I wanna hear you SCREAM!"

"This was a very clever idea."

"[with a gun pointed at him] Wait! Computers. What if one day...they were in charge?"

"Gentlemen, I can get you obstructed-view tickets for Rock of Ages. Even I admit that's not very temping, but I'm not made of tickets, goddamn it!"

"Danson and Highsmith shoot, drive, and sex with style. They're rock stars. Then you got your jokers, your ball-busters, your vets... and the other guys."

"Cops still argue to this day why Danson and Highsmith jumped. Maybe it was just pride, having survived so many brushes with death. Maybe their egoes pushed them off. I don't know. But that shit was crazy. Either way, there was a hole in New York City, and it needed to be filled."

"It was the king of the mutt cases, but Allen and Terry had worked it like stars. Within 24 hours of learning about Ershon's scheme and Lendl's massive losses, the government issued TARP funds to bail out Lendl. They were too big to fail. Ershon now resides in Palomino Federal Correctional Facility in Florida. He still invests. Currency's just different. Roger Wesley was linked to the Beaman murder by security cam footage which Martin and Fosse hadn't checked. It only showed the back of their heads. But Alan's Faceback app was able to get a match to their faces. Terry married Francine. He played harp at the reception and it was beautiful. He had learned how to play it in the eighth grade to make fun of the fairy that lived up the street. Terry asked Sheila to be his best man, but she declined. Let's be honest, we all wanna be superstars and hotshots. But guess what? The people that do the real work, the ones that make the difference, you don't see them on TV or on the front page. I'm talking about the day-in, day-outers, the grinders. Come on, man, you know who I'm talking about: the other guys."

"Listen, guys. I'm working two jobs. I'm working here, and I got another job at Bed, Bath and Beyond. Okay? I'm doing that just to put a kid through NYU so he can explore his bisexuality and become a deejay. Now the last thing I need is a ballistics report in the unit. I'm just gonna ask you guys. Please, come on. Really. Just think about it. Just be smart."

"[to the Bed Bath & Beyond staff] First thing's first: the new bath mats are here. Second thing: there's a serial rapist in Crown Heights... sorry, that's from my other job, ignore that. No, wait, don't ignore it, especially if you live in Crown Heights. Walk in pairs."

"There are three things I love in this world: Kylie Minogue, small dimples just above a woman's buttocks... and the fear in a man's eye who knows I'm about to hurt him."

"Listen, if you don't shut up, I'll cut your ear off with a butter knife."

"Someone's been playing Grand Theft Auto."

"NY's finest were busy."

"When the top cops are busy, our only hope is the other guys."

"Who were you expecting?"

"Will Ferrell as Detective Allen "Gator" Gamble"

"Mark Wahlberg as Detective Terry Hoitz"

"Eva Mendes as Dr. Sheila Ramos Gamble"

"Michael Keaton as Captain Gene Mauch"

"Steve Coogan as Sir David Ershon"

"Ray Stevenson as Roger Wesley"

"Samuel L. Jackson as Detective P.K. Highsmith"

"Dwayne Johnson as Detective Christopher Danson"

"Lindsay Sloane as Francine"

"Natalie Zea as Christinith"

"Rob Riggle as Detective Evan Martin"

"Damon Wayans, Jr. as Detective Fosse"

"Viola Harris as Mama Ramos"

"Rob Huebel as Officer Watts"

"Brett Gelman as Hal"

"Bobby Cannavale as Jimmy"

"Andy Buckley as Don Beaman"

"Ben Schwartz as Beaman's Assistant"

"Adam McKay as Dirty Mike"

"Zach Woods as Douglas"

"Anne Heche as Pamela Boardman (uncredited)"

"Ice-T as Narrator (uncredited)"