The Bonfire of the Vanities

"If you're going to live in a whorehouse, there's only one thing you can do: be the best damn whore around."

"[Narrating] A $600 million bond, to which he stood to get $1.8 million on commission, which would retire the mortgage on his Park Avenue co-op. For Sherman McCoy, that was all in a day's work."

"[narrating] Our hero, Sherman McCoy, was about to make a simple phone call. But despite the existence of 11 telephones, and 7 different lines, in 14 rooms of his 16-million-plus dollar apartment, this was a phone call he could not make at home."

"[narrating] It was all over. There was no hope now. The darkness closed in around them. And then I noticed the most peculiar thing. Sherman was smiling."

"[narrating] Yes see, Sherman, who started with so much, lost everything. But he gained his soul. Whereas I, you see, who started with so little, gained everything. "What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world, but loses..." Ah well. There are compensations."

"Remember guys, a frantic salesman is a dead salesman!"

"[to court room] Racist? You dare call me racist? Well I say unto you, what does it matter the color of a man's skin if witnesses perjure themselves. If a prosecutor enlists the perjurers. When a district attorney throws a man to the mob for political gain, and men of the cloth, men of God, take the prime cuts? Is that justice? I don't hear you...Let me tell you what justice is. Justice is the law. And the law is man's feeble attempt to lay down the principles of decency. Decency! And decency isn't a deal, it's not a contract or a hustle or an angle! Decency... decency is what your grandmother taught you. It's in your bones! Now you go home. Go home and be decent people. Be decent."

"Reverend Bacon: [about the incident with Henry Lamb] This is a tragedy! A fine young man has been struck down. God- fearing, church-going, never in trouble, graduating from high school, ready for college - and somebody comes along - some rich white people in a rich white man's car and wham! They run him down and never even stop. Now what are we going to do about these parking tickets?"

"Judy McCoy: I'm leaving you! [pause] After the party... and now, if you will excuse me, we have guests."

"Sir Gerald Moore: I was at dinner last evening, and halfway through the pudding, this four-year-old child came alone, dragging a little toy cart. And on the cart was a fresh turd. Her own, I suppose. The parents just shook their heads and smiled. I've made a big investment in you, Peter. Time and money, and it's not working. Now, I could just shake my head and smile. But in my house, when a turd appears, we throw it out. We dispose of it. We flush it away. We don't put it on the table and call it caviar."

"Maria Ruskin: [when she and Sherman end up in Bronx] Sherman... where are all the white people?"

"Take one Wall Street tycoon, his Fifth Avenue mistress, a reporter hungry for fame, and make the wrong turn in the Bronx... then sit back and watch the sparks fly."

"An outrageous story about greed, lust vanity in America."

"Tom Hanks - Sherman McCoy"

"Bruce Willis - Peter Fallow"

"Melanie Griffith - Maria Ruskin"

"Kim Cattrall - Judy McCoy"

"Saul Rubinek - Jed Kramer"

"Morgan Freeman - Judge Leonard White"

"Kevin Dunn - Tom Killian"

"Clifton James - Albert Fox"

"Louis Giambalvo - Ray Andruitti"

"Donald Moffat - Mr. McCoy"

"Alan King - Arthur Ruskin"

"John Hancock - Reverend Bacon"

"Robert Stephens - Sir Gerald Moore"