Silvio Berlusconi

"To me Silvio Berlusconi incarnates all the qualities a stateman should have. When I studied politics, I was taught that the ideal politician is a man who having had success in his own profession and not having economic worries for himself and his family, decides to devote part of his life to the service of his people at the local or national level, which is tantamount to saying that the ideal politician ought to be:"

"Think of how many women there are out there who would like to go to bed with me, but don't know it. Life is a problem of communication"

"I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out."

"We must be aware of the superiority of our civilization, a system that has guaranteed well-being, respect for human rights and — in contrast with Islamic countries — respect for religious and political rights, a system that has as its value understanding of diversity and tolerance … The West will continue to conquer peoples, even if it means a confrontation with another civilization, Islam, firmly entrenched where it was 1,400 years ago."

"They have tried to hang me on an isolated word, taken out of context from my whole speech … I did not say anything against the Islamic civilization... It's the work of some people in the Italian leftist press who wanted to tarnish my image and destroy my long-standing relations with Arabs and Muslims."

"I am absolutely sure to be the most democratic man to ever become Prime Minister in Italy."

"I always win, I'm cursed to win."

"I know in Italy there is a producer, producing a film on Nazi concentration camps. I will suggest you for the role of kapo. You would be perfect for that role."

"I'm a man of honour, a truthful person, a gentleman of absolute morality."

"To do that kind of job you must be mentally disturbed."

"If they do that kind of job is because they are anthropologically different from the other human beings."

"Mussolini never killed anyone, he just sent dissenters abroad for vacation."

"There is a natural right that says that when the state asks you for a third of what you earned through back-breaking work, this seems to you a reasonable demand and you give in. If the state asks you for more, or much more, then it is a clear abuse against you and then you try to find evasive ways to make you feel coherent to your intimate sense of morality and it doesn't make you feel ethically guilty."

"Let's talk about football and women. … Gerhard, why don't you start?"

"Foreign press is usually leftist and describes us differently from what we really are."

"If the left wing was to rule, the result would be misery, terror and death, like it happens in every place where communism rules."

"The left has always been on the wrong side. They were against Hitler, but not against Stalin."

"I used all my playboy skills and courted the Finnish President."

"We must fight against tax evasion but also defend the rights of tax evaders, or companies that make mistakes"

"I am the Jesus Christ of politics. I am a patient victim, I sacrifice myself for everyone."

"By definition, as a Prime Minister I cannot be a liar."

"Thank you dear Father Massimiliano, I'll try not to let you down and I promise you two and a half months of complete sexual abstinence until April 9 [election]."

"Only Napoleon did more than I have done. But I am definitely taller."

"Churchill liberated us from the Nazis, Silvio Berlusconi is liberating us from communists."

"Do it my way and earn more money."

"Go and read the black book on communism and you'll find that under Mao's China they didn't eat babies but they boiled them to fertilise the fields."

"I have Italian citizens in too good consideration to think that there are so many voting assholes (literally: "coglioni", rude word for testicles) around which could vote against their own interests. I apologize for the rude but effective language."

"The April 9th/10th vote is like that one of 1948, when democratic forces rejected the communist offensive and firmly moved the Country to the West, towards democracy and its values."

"The journalist Enzo Biagi left the RAI out of free will … he did it for the money."

"The public prosecutor … should be subject to regular examinations to attest to sanity."

"Marcello Dell'Utri is right: Mangano was a hero, because he never invented anything about me."

"Ghe pensi mi."

"They're not gaffes. I've made no gaffes."

"The women of the Right are certainly the most beautiful … the Left has no taste, not even when it comes to women"

"People will vote for Daniela Santanchè because she is a beautiful babe."

"Ladies, I have a mission for you on election day: cook! Sweet and exquisite things, please. Bring them to the polling station to be examined. The boldest can try making a tart, the most skilful, profiteroles"

"It's the fate of the lion in winter: all his billions, all his television channels cannot rescue him from the mockery that rains down on the aged lecher, his powers visibly waning."

"They keep calling me a dwarf, but I'm taller than Sarkozy and Putin."

"Barack Obama being young, handsome and sun-tanned is going to get along with you swimmingly."

"We could not field a big enough force to avoid this risk [of rape]. We would need so many soldiers because our women are so beautiful."

"In absolute terms, I am the most legally persecuted man of all times, in the whole history of mankind, worldwide."

"The real Italian anomaly is not Silvio Berlusconi but communist prosecutors and communist judges in Milan who have attacked him again and again since he entered politics."

"I wish luck to you and your nation that loves you as the election results we can see testify."

"Being a piduist is not a title of demerit."

"P2 gathered the best men in the country, and signing up was not a mistake but an accident through no fault of our own."

"When I received my membership card it said I was an apprentice bricklayer and I, who was a great home builder at the time, couldn't help but have a good laugh."

"We don't want to see just one forward up front. To win you have to score. To have chances you've got to have forwards close to the goal, I appreciated Leonardo a lot but I disagreed with him in how he fielded the team. Ronaldinho must play on the shoulder of the strikers even if he has a tendency to drift left. Ronaldinho has been linked in the media with a move away but Berlusconi was adamant the playmaker was staying. He is the No1 attraction at Milan," he said, "Ronaldinho does not want to leave. I'm sure he is happy to stay. I would be happy for Gattuso to stay but we are not against people saying they want to leave, We can't exclude [the sale of Huntelaar] even if we are convinced of his qualities as a main striker."

"They called me, inviting me to watch L'Infedele. I'm watching a disgusting program, run in a despicable, vile and repulsive way. I've heard false and distorted views, far away from the truth. I've seen a representation of reality which is to the contrary of truth."

"I hope that in Egypt there can be a transition toward a more democratic system without a break from President Mubarak, who in the West, above all in the United States, is considered the wisest of men and a precise reference point."

"We are worried about everything happening there, in all the area. I haven't yet heard from Gaddafi. The situation is evolving and so I don't feel I should disturb anyone."