Ron English

"Death is more interesting from a distance."

"The womb is the first portal to the hereafter."

"The rumors of my death are only a pending reality."

"Even if you live to one hundred, you’ll still be dead forever."

"Death is nature’s way of staying in charge."

"Everyone is dead in heaven."

"I can no more imagine my demise than remember my birth."

"There is much to accomplish before I become fertilizer for the foliage."

"Live life like you're writing your own obituary."

"No evil comes from the fear of hell, no good comes from the promise of heaven."

"In the future everyone will be dead for 15 minutes."

"My reflections always get it backwards."

"Evolution is the myth that keeps on morphing."

"Narcissism makes me feel better about myself."

"Fame always finds the village idiot."

"Art is the canary in the goldmine."

"Sell a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will put you out of a job."

"Last place is first place in the very next race."

"You can’t judge a book while it’s on fire."

"You don’t protest air pollution by holding your breath."

"There’s nothing to dream about in heaven."

"Criminals are the product of arrested development."

"Familiarity is the enemy of admiration."

"There’s nothing more dangerous than a good idea."

"You can lead a horse to Harvard but you can’t make him think."

"The only ass I follow is my own."

"If you believe, it doesn’t have to be true."

"Footprints go unnoticed on a well-worn path."

"You can’t part the waters without making some waves."

"The end of the world goes on forever."

"My heart is in the right place… between my lungs."

"I’ve built my house with the stones you’ve thrown."

"Life is hardest on the headstrong."

"The fastest way to the future is to bypass the past."

"Every silver lining obscures a cloud."

"If I wanted your opinion, I wouldn’t bother having one of my own."

"The best things in life have fleas."

"A ripe apple never toppled the tree."

"Patience is wasted on the lazy."

"Every river is looking for an ocean."

"My thoughts hold my mind together."

"Holding contradictory ideas balances the brain."

"The human heart beats itself to death."

"Nothing is normal until you get used to it."

"You’re only young forever."

"It’s not the journey that weighs you down; it’s the baggage."

"Talent is the enemy of taste. Taste is the enemy of talent."

"The longest journey ends where apathy begins."

"You can’t have your cake and your waistline, too."

"The only good artist is a dead artist."