"I see myself more as an ambassador of the game. And I hope to bring chess to a higher level in the United States. Making bigger tournaments, more interesting events. Making it a respectable profession for young people to be able to pursue in the future."

"African continent GMs do exist; but, according to the system of racial classification, I am the first Black GM in history...it matters, and doesn't matter, all at the same time."

""Most amateurs hate Chess 960 because it makes them feel stupid, but most Grandmasters love it because it makes them feel like amateurs again. It’s a chance for the chess elite to explore brand new worlds of wonderment and discovery." — Twitter September 2022"

"Maurice is a born fighter; he’s tricky and aggressive. Maurice confidently contests the sharpest lines of any opening without worrying about whether his opponent will know it better or come up with a novelty. To earn the GM title, Maurice had to go past his natural talents and work hard on raising his positional and endgame play to the GM standard."

"Maurice Ashley is not only a chess grandmaster, but he is a grandmaster at story-telling. He knows how to get to get kids hooked on the strategies and complexities of chess. In an age where kids too often play video games that are like junk food for the brain, Maurice is getting kids to sharpen their minds and build their character through the ancient game of chess."

"Maurice's street savvy gives him instant credibility with children of all ages. I never tire of watching a room full of kids who have absolutely no interest in chess light up as Maurice tells his story. His ideas change lives and needs to be heard. Invest in your child's future; buy this book today."

"As the first (and only) African American International Grand Master, Maurice Ashley is an historical figure. He is also a superb writer and a compelling teacher who makes learning even the most difficult aspects of chess appear possible. He shows us how chess can be used to put our young people on the path to success."

"Chess improves strategic thinking, attention span, patience, camaraderie and sportsmanship. Maurice Ashley is not only an international grand master as a player but also as a teacher and activist."

"Maurice Ashley has been like a brother to me since I was twelve years old. I know the man, I know the competitor, I know the artist, and I know the teacher."

""You think you can get away with murder / You don't know who you're fooling with / I'm going to shoot you with my BB gun" - Fuck With Me and Find Out"

"Of course, Willis is above criticism -- it's hard to criticize something that is essentially variations on one simple theme, let alone a batch of songs written by a schizophrenic -- but that still doesn't make listening to any of his records any easier."

""This man watches the football game / He enjoyed every minute of it / He was watching the Chicago Bears beat the San Francisco 49ers / You damn right!" - NFL Shit"

""O.J. Simpson was a no-good jerk / He is a fucking asshole / He had no business killing his ex-wife Nicole, or her friend Ronald Goldman" - O.J. Simpson"

""Spider-Man messed with my girlfriend / Spider-Man wrapped his arms around her with my bedroom door closed / Suddenly, I opened the bedroom door on Spider-Man's sneaky ass / I caught him kissing my girlfriend and beat him to a pulp with a rubber hose" - I Whipped Spider-Man's Ass"

""You are so great. You are my brother / You are a cold-blooded KILLER! You are a mass murderer!" - Chuckie"

""After I stole your Sony ESP Car Discman, I went across the street to a gas station / I found me an empty jug and filled it up with gasoline / Suddenly, I ran back to your Lamborghini to set it on fire / I doused your Lamborghini with gasoline and torched it" - I Broke Out Your Windshield"

""I used to eat McDonald's hamburgers / I used to eat three Big Macs a night / In 1992, I gained 23 more pounds / Suddenly, I weighed 360 pounds heavier" - I'm Slimming Down"

""Jim Sym got on my ass for screaming like a wild animal at Genesis on Western / I freaked out a lot of customers / I also said 'suck my dick' in front of a lot of people" - Outburst"

""Suck a racehorse's bootyhole / Suck a snow leopard's ass / Suck a constipated goat's dick / Suck my doberman pincher's cock" - Suck My Dog's Dick"

""Christmas is Jesus Christ's birthday! / That's what it is all about in the mix!" - Merry Christmas"

""It's the end of World War I / It's the end of World War II!" - It's the End of the Western"

""Destroy civilization, motherfucker!" - Stealth Bomber"

""Stop shooting old ladies." - Stop the Violence"

""The bandit wore a werewolf mask" - Attempted Armed Robbery"

"At 10:00 PM, I drove my bronco back to Birdman's real estate / I jumped over his fence after dark / I picked up a brick and shattered Birdman's window pane / Birdman sighted me doing it and reached for his pistol / Suddenly I jumped back in my bronco and took off like O.J. Simpson" - Birdman Kicked My Ass"

""I smoke my crack pipe everyday / I have a good time at it / I jack my mother for dope money / I do it by threatening her life with a semi-automatic" - I Smoke Weed"

""When the police pulled up, I was doomed / I was arrested for possession of a controlled substance / I was taken to the metal clink / I was nothing but a loser" - I Smoke Weed"

""This beast killed as many as 100,000 people / It's wings can flap like a bird / It can break a glass / It can also stab you in the ass" - The Chicken Cow"

""I love your movies! I love you, too!" - Arnold Schwarzenegger"

""You are my favorite movie star / You are my big buddy / You are a low-down rotten man / You are crazy like a roll lizard" - Arnold Schwarzenegger"

""Fill me full of lead in my ass crack" - Shoot Me in the Ass"

""You are nothing but a crazy ass jerk!" - You Fucked That Man's Car Up"

""Batman beat the hell out of me and knocked me to the floor / I got back up and knocked him to the floor / He was being such a jack off" - I Whupped Batman's Ass"

""At 11:00 PM, the police came to my mother's house to eject her ... they locked her up for being a loser." - My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks"

""My mother smokes that crack like a cigar / She had a good time at it / She jacks my brother for dope money / She does this by threatening him with a Smith and Wesson" - My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks"

"Once upon a time, I was cursing at Daniels Chapel AME Zion Church / I called one of the deacons a motherfucker / Reverend Henry E. Miller preached about my vulgar language / He told the congregation in the sanctuary that I got a nasty filthy mouth" - They Threw Me Out of Church"

"Take your ass to the barber shop / Tell the barber you're sick of looking like an asshole" - Cut the Mullet"

"Do something about your long filthy hair / It looks like a rat's nest" - Cut the Mullet"

""Dale Dunkey shot my house up / He shot it up to get rid of the termites / He then shot at me with his BB gun" - The Termites Ate My House Up"

""It was Sunday, March 12th, 2000 at 6:20 PM / I was about to fly from Chicago-Midway to Orlando, Florida / Suddenly my mean schizophrenic demon called me a jerk / Suddenly I yelled 'FUCK YOU' on the airplane" - My Keyboard Got Damaged"

""Suck a polar bear's funky ass!" - Suck a Cheetah's Dick"

""The vultures were hungry." - The Vultures Ate My Dead Ass Up"

""I have a mean schizophrenia demon in my head / My demon racks me with profanity / My demon tells me lies and says I'm a jerk, a bum and an asshole / My demon keeps me from joy bus riding by torturing me" - Wesley Willis"

""I am a good person to the max / I am a good guy in Jesus' name." - Wesley Willis"

""McDonald's hamburgers are the worst / They are worse than Burger King's" - Rock 'N Roll McDonald's"

""McDonald's is a place to rock / It is a restaurant where they buy food to eat / It is a good place to listen to the music / People flock here to get down to the rock music." - Rock 'N Roll McDonald's"

"From now on, I'm staying away from fatty foods, by eating healthy foods, and going on a strict diet"

"Before I got fat, I was slim / That was this time when I was eating McDonalds."

"Number 1. I'm gonna do this song again. Number 2. I'm gonna do this song again all the way up your ass. Number 3. I'm gonna fuck your ass up like in a car crash. Number 4. I'm gonna fuck you up like a goddamn accident. Number 5. Jesus is the answer!"