Ben Aaronovitch

"It’s a police rule of thumb that anything involving members of the public takes twice as long as you think it will."

"“Unless you believe it was a coincidence that Melvin the Rat turned up at a party we were hosting.” Actually I thought it probably was, but I found that when people are nursing a grievance it’s a waste of time trying to explain the ubiquitous nature of coincidence in the universe. People always want things to happen for a reason."

"Inside he had the soul of an accountant, but alas none of the facility with numbers."

"It was already one of the hazards of being police that you became suspicious of the everyday. You didn’t have to spend much time on the job before realising that professional criminals are comparatively rare and that crime is something committed by ordinary people."

"I wondered, not for the first time, whether all farmers become obsessed or if only obsessive people become farmers."

"If you run everywhere you miss stuff that you might have been better off noticing—just saying."

"“Are there aliens?” Simon asks Indigo. “Not that I know of,” she says. “Unless you count cats.”"

"“Have fun,” she says and releases me. “Make trouble.”"

"You make a plan without intelligence—you might as well not have a plan at all."

"“Are you a practitioner?” I ask. “A wizard?” “Sorceress, my dear,” she says. “Practitioner is how the gentlemen have styled themselves, as quacks now style themselves as physicians.”"

"None of those choices seemed likely, but if I’ve learned one thing on the job, it is that a coincidence can kill someone just as easily as malice."

"“You’re probably wondering why I decided to grace you with my presence,” he said. Which was true, since DCIs spend most of their life in their offices or, worse, in other people’s offices and conference rooms. “Playing,” Seawoll once said, “pin the fucking buzzword on the sodding flow chart.”"

"“My mum is game for any branch of Christianity that involves singing and hellfire,” I said. “She likes churches so much she switches to a new one twice a year.”"

"“Giant squids are pretty alien,” I said. “Not to another giant squid,” said Beverley."

"But this was the eighteenth century, when life was cheap and ambition unlimited."

"According to my therapist, attaching conditionals to your past is a classic distancing technique indicating an unwillingness to face your memories directly. Or, I pointed out, it could be a rhetorical device designed to add a humorous note to enliven a story. To which she said, “Or both.” You can’t win with therapists, you know. And even if you do, they just tell you it’s part of the process."

"I don’t like the fact that all we have so far is that somebody did something to somebody at some time which may or may not have some fucking connection so some other people who we’re not sure still exist."

"“Isn’t the internet wonderful?” she said. “Better than dragons any day.”"

"The trouble with turning a blind eye is that people often take the opportunity to punch you in the face."

"This is what’s known as operational flexibility, and definitely not making it up as you go along."

"Now I was used to it, the bell-like silence was louder than ever, and I was starting to get undertones of orange blossom and incense. You have to be careful with this stuff or you begin to sound like a wine taster—with about the same amount of meaningless bollocks."

"Dr. Walid’s theory was that the news media and their consumers unconsciously shied away from events that didn’t fall within the narrow band of their expectations. Shot by a jealous lover or stabbed by a body were narratives they could run with. Killed in an unspecified manner with no witnesses, no CCTV, and no obvious motive probably piqued their curiosity, but would it get clicks or sell papers? More importantly, would it fit the news agenda their organization worked to?"

"“Desperate people do desperate things,” said Spencer-Talbot. “Perhaps if we all did more to make things less desperate, then perhaps there would be less violence.”"

"“This is a terrible work,” I said. “Why did you do it?” “The usual reasons,” said the Magister. “I told myself it was piety and duty to the Church, but a thousand years of contemplation will batter down the doors of one’s own delusions.”"