"Progress doesn't come from early risers — progress is made by lazy men looking for easier ways to do things."

"History has the relation to truth that theology has to religion — i.e., none to speak of."

"Oh, I have strong opinions, but a thousand reasoned opinions are never equal to one case of diving in and finding out…"

"Security people always spy on their bosses; they can’t help it, it’s a syndrome that goes with the job."

"There’s no virtue in being old, it just takes a long time."

"Human beings hardly ever learn from the experience of others. They learn — when they do, which isn't often — on their…"

"Age does not bring wisdom. Often it merely changes simple stupidity into arrogant conceit. Its only advantage, so far…"

"“Then you believe in an afterlife?” “Slow up! I don’t ‘believe’ in anything. I know certain things — little things, n…"

"I spent my boyhood the way every boy does — trying to keep my elders from finding out what I was up to."

"The purpose of my government is never to do good, but simply to refrain from doing evil."