"I have a lot of trouble writing or doing anything unless the pressure is on . . . If left to my own devices, I'd spend a lot of time playing with my kids and my dogs."

"The wonderful thing is we're allowed to say what we think . . . Your stories can be more true, more honest, more direct. If a person at a press conference says something I think is ludicrous, I get to say it's ludicrous . . . You try not to distort the truth because someone you're profiling you think is on the right side of abortion or trade or any other issue. That would be dishonest."

"I thought I'd be ragged for writing a puffy piece. My wife said people are going to think you're hunting for a job in the Bush campaign."

"[[Grover Norquist|[Grover] Norquist]] is a mean-spirited, humorless, dishonest little creep . . . an embarrassing anomaly, the leering, drunken uncle everyone else wishes would stay home . . . [He] is repulsive, granted, but there aren't nearly enough of him to start a purge trial."

"Children born with Down Syndrome are not vegetables, nor are their lives demonstrably not worth living."

"2013: Felix Salten: Bambi: Eine Lebensgeschichte aus dem Walde, publisher: tacheles, ISBN 978-3864840289"

"2009: Heike Faller: Wie ich einmal versuchte, reich zu werden, publisher: Random House Audio, ISBN 978-3-8371-7610-0"

"Tonight, nobody could vote for their own country, but it is good to be able to vote and it is good to have a choice. Good luck on your journey, Azerbaijan. Europe is watching you!"

"Man soll aufhören, wenn es am schönsten ist - aber wir hatten nach der ersten Sendung nicht den Mut."

"Ich bin so aufgeregt wie in meiner ersten Sendung. Da schließt sich der Kreis. Der Teufelskreis."

"I don't hate fools, I pity them! (I pity the fool)"

"Hey fool, this ain't no football game! (A-Team)"

"You gonna lose a deal over $35? Thats chump change! My lunch cost $35!"

"Love is a verb... and Verbs show action"

"Eight out of twenty?!? That's only a third, and third rhymes with Turd! That's bad."

"Take it from me...Mr.T"

"I pity that chump Conan O'Brien."

"I pity Screech, because everybody pitied Screech. --NBC 75th Anniversary Special"

"It's a crack baby....FOOL"

"Mother, I always Love Her. My Mother. So treat Her right, treat Her right."

"Mother, There is No Other. Like Mother So treat Her right, treat Her right."

"Hannibal is on the jazz."

"What!?! Idiot shot the tires on my van!!"

"I pity the fool, thug, or soul who tries to take over the world."

"I'm on a real short leash here, and I'm tired of your crazy rap!"

"Don't make me mad, Arrr!"

"I got no time for the jibba-jabba."

"Where's the meat? This sandwich is full of weeds! I don't eat nothing I don't know!"

"I ain't getting on no plane, Hannibal!"

"Shut up Murdock, crazy fool!"

"Hey, sucka!"

"You don't rehearse Mr. T, you just turn him loose."

""You've got to testify! Tell somebody about it. God is good!" "I pity the fool that don't get it." - Mr. T going for Jury Duty."

"People ask what gives me the authority to give advice? I say, First of all, I don't give advice. Dr Phil gives advice. Mr T helps people. I motivate them, I inspire them, I give them hope, and I plant the seed so they can feel good about themselves."

"I'm not perfect, I'm not an angel, but I try to live a certain way because it brings honour and respect to my mother. I tell people that when they look at me, they're looking at nothing but a big, overgrown, tough mama's boy. That's who I am."

"I said "Hell no, because you didn't find a weapon; or if that's the charge you would have to lock me up because my hands and feet are deadly weapons.""

"When you see me now, I'm nothing but a big overgrown tough mama's boy. And I speak that with glee because the problem with society is we don't have enough mama's boys."

"I tell people that I was born and raised in the ghetto, but the ghetto was not born and raised in me."

"I wanted to win to feed the hungry people of my community. I didn't want to win to buy a diamond – I didn't have no diamonds then. I didn't want to win to buy a car, I didn't want to win to bring a couple of chicks downtown to a hotel. I wanted to win to feed the poor people of the community."

"You're going through college, and you're going to be faced with a lot of things. You're going to face adversity, the main thing is don't quit. For many people it's easy to quit, but don't. That's what separates the winners from the losers, what separates the all-stars from the also-rans."

"I think about my father being called 'boy,' my uncle being called 'boy,' my brother, coming back from Vietnam and being called 'boy.' So I questioned myself: 'What does a black man have to do before he's given the respect as a man?' So when I was 18 years old, when I was old enough to fight and die for my country, old enough to drink, old enough to vote, I said I was old enough to be called a man. I self-ordained myself Mr. T so the first word out of everybody's mouth is 'Mr.' That's a sign of respect that my father didn't get, that my brother didn't get, that my mother didn't get."

"I pity the university for not giving T enough time. You know I got all duded up, got dressed, the students were all ready for me, then they gave me short time. So I pity them. So if they want to be unpitied, they'll invite me back and give me more time."

"I remember one time I tried to pity this fool. He told me his name was Jeff. He was married. He pulled out his wallet and showed me three pictures of his kids; Kelly, Robert, Brittany. Real cute kids. Don't get too close man. It's hard to pity a fool if you get too close."

"People ask me what the "T" stands for in my name. If you're a man, the "T" stands for tough. If you're a woman or child, it stands for tender!"

"It takes a smart guy to play dumb."

"For 5 years Mr. T disappeared. Fools went unpitied and Jibba-Jabba went unchallenged!"

"I believe in the Golden Rule - The Man with the Gold... rules."

"I pity the fool who drinks soy milk."

"As a kid, I got three meals a day. Oatmeal, miss-a-meal and no meal."

"I ain't no computer hacker!"