"Yes, you see, we confused you with one of our sex-change patients, but don't worry, we didn't remove your penis. We did, however, cut off your testicles, but since your wife's dead, you won't be needin' 'em!"

"No, it's not your dead wife."

"[before falling down after Albert pushed him] Shiiiit!..."

"You have an incredible ass!"

"Hey anyone want to get high? I have some hash with me. White guy in the dreads, you know what I am talking about? Can I get a what-what? Holla! I've got a stiff pole for your sweet hole. Anyone? Anyone? Pussies!"

"That's a lie. I think of suicide every single day."

"I'll drive."

"Watch where you're going in slo-mo, dipshit!"

"Don't forget about the bitches."

"And once a month you'll bleed from your vagina!"

"I can't breathe; you're kneelin' on my balls!"

"You did surgery on me?"

"Look at you, eatin' junk food, wearin' fake beards."

"With great power comes hot bitches."

"[last words, before being killed by his hourglass bomb] Oh, fuck."

"I met a girl at Craigslist."

"I just shat my pants."

"No, crazy is hearin' voices, talkin' to cats, datin' Paula Abdul. I am not crazy; I...am a visionary!"

"Are you frickin' insane?!"

"Good. You're a hard-working fine young man. Let's hope you're not brutally murdered, too!"

"Why yes. This is, healthy cough blood."

"[to Jill] I realize, we can never be together."

"Those are Celine Dion lyrics!"

"I met a guy at Craigslist."

"I'm looking seriously over the city...in a squatting position."