""This beast killed as many as 100,000 people / It's wings can flap like a bird / It can break a glass / It can also stab you in the ass" - The Chicken Cow"

""Destroy civilization, motherfucker!" - Stealth Bomber"

"The music I love to play is Rock 'N Roll. I love to rock like a wild animal. I love to rock it well enough to whip a yak's ass. I love to whip it good on a horse's ass. I love to rock it real hard. I love to rock it all the way to Russia. I love to kick out the Jazz and kick it out all the way."

""When the police pulled up, I was doomed / I was arrested for possession of a controlled substance / I was taken to the metal clink / I was nothing but a loser" - I Smoke Weed"

"Once upon a time I fucked a slut in the ass. She was all over my dick. I made her lick my dick off, then I turned around and rammed my big black dick back in her ass. / Say Ronald Reagan, what the fuck are you doing in my house? Get out of here right now, and don't you ever come back over here again! If you come back this way, I will shoulder the weapon and shoot the living shit out of you!"

""You are nothing but a crazy ass jerk!" - You Fucked That Man's Car Up"

""You think you can get away with murder / You don't know who you're fooling with / I'm going to shoot you with my BB gun" - Fuck With Me and Find Out"

""Batman beat the hell out of me and knocked me to the floor / I got back up and knocked him to the floor / He was being such a jack off" - I Whupped Batman's Ass"

""Fill me full of lead in my ass crack" - Shoot Me in the Ass"

"Rock music pays off. Rock music takes me on a joyride. Rock music keeps me off the hell city bus. Rock music will always look out for me. But I will not let my torture profanity demon shoot it down."

""My mother smokes that crack like a cigar / She had a good time at it / She jacks my brother for dope money / She does this by threatening him with a Smith and Wesson" - My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks"

""You are my favorite movie star / You are my big buddy / You are a low-down rotten man / You are crazy like a roll lizard" - Arnold Schwarzenegger"

"My demons talk to me in profanity. They think I'm a jerk. A bum. And an asshole. I just say they're a jerk, they're a bum, they're an asshole. They're no good. They better leave me alone and get off my case."

"Number 1. I'm gonna do this song again. Number 2. I'm gonna do this song again all the way up your ass. Number 3. I'm gonna fuck your ass up like in a car crash. Number 4. I'm gonna fuck you up like a goddamn accident. Number 5. Jesus is the answer!"

""At 11:00 PM, the police came to my mother's house to eject her ... they locked her up for being a loser." - My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks"

""It's the end of World War I / It's the end of World War II!" - It's the End of the Western"

"Before I got fat, I was slim / That was this time when I was eating McDonalds."

""Christmas is Jesus Christ's birthday! / That's what it is all about in the mix!" - Merry Christmas"

"From now on, I'm staying away from fatty foods, by eating healthy foods, and going on a strict diet"

""Suck a racehorse's bootyhole / Suck a snow leopard's ass / Suck a constipated goat's dick / Suck my doberman pincher's cock" - Suck My Dog's Dick"

"Sometimes we think that we're gonna be the first people to cross the genres of human and superhuman. We've got to live up to this fucking monster we created and it's bigger than we are."

"You come into this world a zero, and you leave a zero."

"People ask me, 'Why Des Moines?' I say, 'Why not, you ignorant motherfucker!'"

"I may seem proud; I may act gay, It's just a pose; I'm not that way, .'Cause deep down in my heart I say, I surrender, dear."

"Sweet and lovely, sweeter than the roses in May, And she loves me, there is nothing more I can say."

"So rare, You're like the sparkle of old champagne; Orchids in cellophane Couldn't compare to you."

"I fell in love with you first time I looked into Them there eyes. You've got a certain li'l cute way of flirtin' with Them there eyes."

"I must be the oldest living child soprano."

"Louis B Mayer created a situation that was just like a very big family, but with love and loyalty for everyone."

"Walk right in, sit right down, baby let your hair hang down. Everybody's talking 'bout a new way of walking; Do you want to lose you mind?"

"I gave you my arms, my lips, my heart, My love, my life, my all, But the best that I had to offer you I found was all too small."

"No truth can be said to be seen as it is until it is seen in its relation to all other truths. In this relation only is it true."

"The longer I live the more conscious I am of human frailty, and of the constant, overwhelming need we all have of God's grace."

"Lay hold on Christ with both your poor, empty hands."

"And as to carrying religion into everything, how can one help it if one's religion is a vital part of one's-self, not a cloak put on to go to church and hang up out of the way against next Sunday."

""Cheerfully and gratefully I lay myself and all I am or own at the feet of Him who redeemed me with His precious blood, engaging to follow Him, bearing the cross He lays upon me." This is the least I can do, and I do it while my heart lies broken and bleeding at His feet."

"It is a religion of principle that God wants from us, not one of mere feeling."

"Not till I was shut up to prayer and to the study of God's word by the loss of earthly joys — sickness destroying the flavor of them all — did I begin to penetrate the mystery that is learned under the cross. And wondrous as it is, how simple is this mystery! To love Christ, and to know that I love Him — this is all."

"The question is not whether you ever gave yourself to God, but whether you are His now."

"Some of His children must go into the furnace to testify that the Son of God is there with them."

"I am not sure that it is best for us, once safe and secure on the Rock of Ages, to ask ourselves too closely what this and that experience may signify. Is it not better to be thinking of the Rock, not of the feet that stand upon it?"

"I thought that prattling boys and girls Would fill this empty room; That my rich heart would gather flowers From childhood's opening bloom.One child and two green graves are mine, This is God's gift to me; A bleeding, fainting, broken heart— This is my gift to Thee."

"Much of my experience of life has cost me a great price and I wish to use it for strengthening and comforting other souls."

"O happy life! life hid with Christ in God! So making me, At home, and by the wayside, and abroad, Alone with Thee!"

"Ah, what a life is theirs who live in Christ; How vast the mystery! Reaching in height to heaven, and in its depth The unfathomed sea!"

"Sleep, baby, sleep! Thy father's watching the sheep. Thy mother's shaking the dreamland tree, And down drops a little dream for thee. Sleep, baby, sleep!"

"You cannot prove to yourself that you love God by examining your feelings towards Him. They are indefinite and they fluctuate. But just so far as you obey Him, just so far, depend upon it, you love Him."

"You cannot will to possess the spirit of Christ; that must come as His gift, but you can choose to study His life, and to imitate it."

"We must be wise task-masters, and not require of ourselves what we can not possibly perform. Recreation we must have. Otherwise, the strings of our soul, wound up to an unnatural tension, will break."

"It sweetens every bit of work to think that I am doing it in humble, far-off, yet real imitation of Jesus."