"Hey, alright! First living person I've seen in nineteen hundred and ninety-nine years! Want to party? I'm just DYING TO PARTY! Hahahaha! It's a joke, but it's still true!"

"Hey, man! I need some balloons for the party, right? If you can bring three of them to me, I might be able to help you out. Do it!"

"Nice job, little dude! Here's the help I promised."

"Welcome to my playground! Now, go home!"

"This is the Dream World. You've been here many times before in your dreams, but this time, you have been called here for a purpose. Several days travel from here is a beautiful princess who has been cruelly imprisoned within a dark and terrifying castle. She is held captive by one of the most vicious beasts of the Dream World. The Guardian who wields the world-destroying power of the Staff of Dreams. Sadly, the princess has no hope of rescue from anyone. Except for you, Tak. And if you should save her from her plight, happiness will be restored to her kingdom and the powers of darkness will be forever diminished. What say you, great and mighty warrior of the Pupanunu people? Will you bring your wits, your strength and your courage to bear on this sacred mission?"

"You're gonna get Thwarked."

"Hello? Anybody here?"

"Jason Marsden as Tak"

"The platformer genre has in many ways grown old and stale over the years. The formula all too often recognizable and even predictable. Drop a cute, cuddly teddy bear of a hero into a colorful landscape filled with gameplay-extending collectibles and then have that character set on a quest to save -- what else? -- a princess. To make matters worse, platformers specifically designed for younger players have sometimes been dumbed down, providing fewer clever puzzles and challenge in favor of more collectibles, a disappointing truth. But thankfully this is not the case with the THQ-published sequel Tak 2: The Staff of Dreams. The title, smartly developed by Avalanche, is carefully designed so that both younger and older players can enjoy it for different reasons. The kids growing up on other popular Nickelodeon tie-ins will naturally be drawn to the aforementioned cute main character and colorful landscapes while adults will appreciate the way the game goes out of its way to make fun of platformer clichés through well-scripted, often humorous dialogue, and that it doesn't skimp on challenge. Indeed, some of the environmental-based puzzles Tak 2 delivers are surprisingly engaging."

"Now, pick how many games are in the challenge. Let's go! Make it snappy!"

"Okay. So, how do you want to play?"

"I used you Taaaak, to defeat the Dream Guardian so I could steal the Staff of Dreams. Pins, Needles! The Staaaaff... Oh, just get the stick."

"Julius Belmont: What is it?"

"Soma Cruz: From here. I will set off to fight against my own fate. If I lose the battle...and I become reincarnation of evil, I want you to kill me."

"Julius Belmont: I will...I promise."

"Genya Arikado: So it has awakened."

"Soma Cruz: What? What has?"

"Genya Arikado: The spirit of the creature you killed has just entered your body. You have the power to absorb the abilities of the monsters you kill."

"Soma Cruz: Finally...I clearly understand...everything. I am...Dracula."

"Soma Cruz: I've got a favour to ask of you."

"Maybe they're nerdy bandits, kupo!"

"Marche is Marche, Ritz is Ritz."

"No, this is by far the most kupo story I've ever heard!"

"Y-You're a lizard!"

"A stuffed animal!? I'll have you know I'm a moogle, kupo!"

"You sure are a keen observer of the obvious, kupo!"

"He's engaging you, kupo!"

"That's escapism, it's not healthy!"

"I am what I have done."

"A mediator? But I thought the Palace and the Resistance couldn't even be in the same room! Let alone... talking!"

"I...I don't know. I'm all confused. And to top it off, I'm talking to a stuffed animal!"

"Um...uh...OK, wait, so an "engagement" is a battle..And the "laws" are the rules for the battle...And that guy in armor is the "judge"?"

"Ah well, I guess the moogle's out of the bag."

"If you could use magic, maybe you'd be better in sports!"

"I'd pick Final Fantasy, that's my favorite."

"...Alta oron. Sondus kameela... It sure sounds like magic!"

"You can't be the "new kid" forever!"

"And I know some "little girls" who can kick your butt!"

"Nono! Long time no kupo!"

"Make it a kupo one!"