"Both men and women want to have sex. It's natural, except we're on different timetables. Women want to have sex, like, y'know, fifteen minutes after us, so alright, if you hold out for twenty she'll be chasing you for five. - Dex"

"And that takes us to Part III of the Tao of Steve, okay? Alright, after you've eliminated your desire, and after you've been excellent in her presence, then you must retreat. Okay? - Dex"

"Doing stuff is overrated. Like Hitler. He did a lot. But don't we all wish he woulda just stayed home and gotten stoned? - Dex // Oh, I see. So you're only options are to get stoned or commit genocide? - Syd"

"I'm not looking for enlightenment, Dex. I'm looking for a girlfriend—that’s it. - Dave // It's all connected. - Dex"

"Don't pretend. Just really let go of your desire. - Dex"

"Getting out of that category of friend is harder than getting out of Alcatraz. - Dex"

"Look chicks are like hunters, man. They want to bag a lion or a bear, something really hard to catch. And along comes Dave, you know, and you're like this affectionate little puppy. You're cute, but you're way too easy to catch and that bores them and with chicks, boredom equals death, man. You can't bore them. - Dex"

"Have you ever noticed how at the beginning of a relationship, right, a guy will do just about anything with his girlfriend because just the thought of seeing her naked gets him excited about going to the opera. - Dex"

"Don Giovanni slept with thousands of women because he was afraid he wouldn't be loved by one. - Syd"

"You have to do something excellent in her presence thus demonstrating your sexual worthiness. - Dex"

"Act like a woman can't join your club and she'll do almost anything to get in. - Friend of Dex's"

". . . when I'm hanging out with a woman, that's all I'm doing is hanging out—talking, listening. I'm not sitting there thinking about how to get in bed with her and this completely confuses them, because they're saying, "Wait a minute. I'm so much better looking than this guy. Isn't he attracted to me?" The basic principle: We pursue that which retreats from us. - Dex"

"If you're out with this girl and you're even thinking about getting laid, you're finished. Because women can smell an agenda like shit on a shoe. - Dex"

"Viggo Mortensen - John W. Poe"

"Tracey Walter - Beever Smith"

"Bradley Whitford - Charles Phalen"

"Scott Wilson - Governor Lew Wallace"

"Howie Young - Poe Posse"

"Robert Knepper - Deputy Carlyle"

"Christian Slater as "Arkansas" Dave Rudabaugh"

"Ah, ah, Pendleton. The white cake, with the sweet frost."

"Best dollar eighty I ever spent"

"Yes your Honor, I do. You can go to hell, hell, hell."

"Heavy steps, Patsy."

"I'll tell ya why, five hundred dollars cuts a lot of ties."

"Yoo Hoo, I'll make ya famous."

"It's your gang Dave. Don't cross me Dave."

"I'm real happy for you, Dave."

"You rode a 15 year old boy straight to his grave. And the rest of us, straight to hell."

"William H. Bonney, you are not a god."

"Billy!! Let's finish the game."

"Tell the governor that i'm Brushy Bill Roberts, alias William Antrim, also known as William H. Bonney, alias Billy the Kid."

"I'd rather drink turpentine and piss on a brush fire, I ain't touchin' this one."

"Emilio Estevez as William H. "Billy the Kid" Bonney/Brushy Bill Roberts (uncredited for the latter)"

"Kiefer Sutherland as Josiah Gordon "Doc" Scurlock"

"Lou Diamond Phillips as Jose Chavez y Chavez"

"William Petersen as Pat Garrett"

"Alan Ruck - Henry "Bullet George" William French"

"James Coburn - John Chisum"

"Balthazar Getty - Tom O'Folliard"

"Jenny Wright - Jane Greathouse"

"Jack Kehoe - Ashmun Upson"

"Reap the whirlwind, Sheriff Brady. Reap it."

"Patrick Wayne - Pat Garrett"