Films Directed By Ivan Reitman

"Tameka Runnels - Keisha"

"Ben Diskin - Sylvester"

"Robert Cave - John"

"Miko Hughes - Joseph"

"Ben McCreary - Lowell"

"Marissa Rosen - Samantha"

"Sarah Rose Karr - Emma"

"Jayne Brook - Mrs. Sullivan, Zach's mother"

"Justin Page - Zach Sullivan"

"Alix Koromzay - Cindy, Danny's friend"

"Tom Kurlander - Danny, Crisp's informant/victim"

"Christian and Joseph Cousins - Dominic Palmieri/Cullen Crisp, Jr."

"Cathy Moriarty - Jillian, Sylvester's mother"

"Carroll Baker - Eleanor Crisp, Cullen Jr's biological grandmother"

"Richard Tyson - Cullen Crisp, Cullen Jr's biological father"

"Linda Hunt - Miss Ingrid Schlowski"

"Pamela Reed - Police Detective Phoebe O'Hara, John's partner"

"Penelope Ann Miller - Joyce Palmieri, Dominic's adoptive mother/Rachel Crisp, Cullen Jr's birth mother"

"Arnold Schwarzenegger - Police Detective John Kimble"

"The story of a man who wanted to keep the world safe for democracy...and meet girls."

"[after stepping off the bus] Boy, I hope this is the mess hall. [looks at Captain Stillman] How’s it goin’ Eisenhower?"

"I've always been kind of a pacifist. When I was a kid, my father told me, "Never hit anyone in anger, unless you're absolutely sure you can get away with it." I don't know what kind of soldier I'm gonna make, but I want you guys to know that if we ever get into real heavy combat... I'll be right behind you guys. Every step of the way."

"[at Czech border crossing, holding map pretending to be lost tourist, talking to Czech soldiers] We're so goddamn lost. Where the hell is Innsbruck, Austria?"

"[breaking up a fight] Cut it out! Cut it out! Cut it out! The hell's the matter with you?! Stupid! We're all very different people. We're not Watusi. We're not Spartans. We're Americans, with a capital 'A', huh? You know what that means? Do ya? That means that our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country in the world. We are the wretched refuse. We're the underdog. We're mutts! Here's proof: his nose is cold! But there's no animal that's more faithful, that's more loyal, more loveable than the mutt. Who saw Old Yeller? Who cried when Old Yeller got shot at the end? [raises his hand] Nobody cried when Old Yeller got shot? I'm sure. [hands are reluctantly raised] I cried my eyes out. [even more hands go up] So we're all dogfaces. We're all very, very different, but there is one thing that we all have in common: we were all stupid enough to enlist in the Army. We're mutants. There's something wrong with us, something very, very wrong with us. Something seriously wrong with us! We're soldiers, but we're American soldiers! We've been kickin' ass for 200 years! We're 10 and 1! Now we don't have to worry about whether or not we practiced. We don't have to worry about whether Captain Stillman wants to have us hung. All we have to do is to be the great American fighting soldier that is inside each one of us. Now do what I do, and say what I say. And make me proud. Fall in!"

"John Candy — Dewey "Ox" Oxberger"

"Warren Oates — Sgt. Hulka"

"Harold Ramis — Russell Ziskey"

"John Diehl — Howard J. "Cruiser" Turkstra"

"John Larroquette — Capt. Stillman"

"Sean Young — Louise Cooper"

"P. J. Soles — Stella Hansen"

"Timothy Busfield — Mortar Soldier"

"Robert J. Wilke — General Barnicke"

"Joe Flaherty — Border Guard"

"Bill Murray — John Winger"

"John Voldstad — Stillman's Aide"

"Lance LeGault — Colonel Glass"

"Roberta Leighton — Anita, Winger's ex-girlfriend"

"Conrad Dunn — Francis "Psycho" Soyer"

"Judge Reinhold — Elmo Blum"