"In case you haven't noticed, and judging by the attendance you haven't, the Indians have managed to win a few here and there, and are threatening to climb out of the cellar."

"[later, with Cerrano about to strike out again] We should've got the live chicken."

"Cerrano's looking for some extra power for tonight. He's looking to sacrifice a live chicken. Hey Jake, man, we can't have people puking in the locker room before the game!"

"Don't you guys go anywhere. I plan to put on a hitting display."

"[Introducing himself] Say, hey! Willie Mays Hayes. I play like Mays, and I run like Hayes."

"[sliding into home plate in a tux] The American Express Card. Don't steal home without it."

"[to Heywood when he swings and misses on Vaughn's 97 MPH fastball] Sucker was moving, wasn't it? If it'd hit you, it'd leave a 2-foot hole coming out."

"[preparing for Vaughn's first pitch to Heywood. Vaughn shakes off the breaking pitches, until Taylor finally signals for a fastball, which Vaughn nods at] Alright, Ricky. Let's get nasty."

"[He tries to throw a runner out, talking to himself] Don't bounce the damn ball...[Overthrows the second baseman] Nice throw, dickhead."

"[about to find out whether he's made the team] Come on Jake. It's only your life."

"Second base... [underthrows second baseman] shit."

"[to Rexman] Hey, Rexman! Hell of a situation we got here. Two on, two out, you guys trailing by one in the ninth. You got a chance to be a hero on national television–if you don't blow it. By the way, I saw your wife at the Capri Lounge last night. Hell of a dancer. You must be very very proud. Oh, and that guy she was with? Oh, I'm sure he's a close personal friend and all, but tell me, what was he doing wearing her panties on his head? [Rexman pops the ball straight up] Uh-oh, Rexy I don't think this one's got the distance."

"[in Mexico, upon receiving a phone call asking him to report to Cleveland Indians spring training] ... is that you, Tolbert?! This isn't very funny, you know. I'm hung over! My knees are killin' me and if you're going to pull this shit at least you could've said you were from the Yankees!"

"Tom Berenger - Jake Taylor"

"Charlie Sheen - Rick Vaughn"

"Wesley Snipes - Willie Mays Hays"

"Rene Russo - Lynn Wells"

"Corbin Bernsen - Roger Dorn"

"Margaret Whitton - Rachel Phelps"

"James Gammon - Lou Brown"

"Bob Uecker - Harry Doyle"

"Chelcie Ross - Eddie Harris"

"Dennis Haysbert - Pedro Cerrano"

"When these three oddballs try to play hardball, the result is totally screwball."

"Rachel Phelps: [while Wild Thing is playing] I hate this fucking song."

"Rachel Phelps: Here's to the thrill of defeat, Charlie."

"Roger Dorn: [Talking about a ground ball he missed] It was out of my reach. What did you want me to do, dive for it?"

"Roger Dorn: Let's cut through the crap, Vaughn. I only got one thing to say to you: Strike this motherfucker out!"

"Pedro Cerrano: Is very bad to steal Jobu's rum... Is very bad."

"Pedro Cerrano: I'm pissed off now, Jobu... I go to you. I stick up for you. And you no help me now... I say FUCK YOU, Jobu. I do it myself."

"Rhys Ifans - Nigel 'The Leg' Gruff"

"I know you're tired, I know you're hurting. I wish I could say something classy and inspirational, but that just wouldn't be our style...Pain heals, chicks dig scars, glory lasts forever."

"[giving the replacement players a pregame speech before their first game] Alright, Sentinels, listen up. Welcome to professional football. [the players clap] I know there's a lot people out there who're going to say that your accomplishments today will soon be forgotten; that you're not real players, that this isn't a real team. And I say that is BULLSHIT! Because as of today, you're all professional football players: you're being paid to play. I want you to remember that because those men whose places you've taken forgot that a long time ago."

"[addressing team] Listen up! This time tomorrow, the strike will be officially over. Now, Dallas has made a big mistake out there tonight. They haven't been afraid of you, and they should be, because you have a powerful weapon working for you tonight: There is no tomorrow for you... and that makes you all VERY DANGEROUS PEOPLE!"

"[closing narration] When the replacement players for the Washington Sentinels left the stadium that day, there was no ticker tape parade, no endorsement deals for sneakers or soda pop, or breakfast cereal. Just a locker to be cleaned out, and a ride home to catch. But what they didn't know, was that their lives had been changed forever because they had been part of something great. And greatness, no matter how brief, stays with a man. Every athlete dreams of a second chance, these men lived it."

"Pros on strike. Everyday guys get to play."

"Throw the ball. Catch the girl. Keep it simple."

"Keanu Reeves - Shane Falco"

"Gene Hackman - Coach Jimmy McGinty"

"Brooke Langton - Annabelle Farrell"

"Orlando Jones - Clifford Franklin"

"Jon Favreau - Daniel Bateman"

"Samuel L. Jackson — Coach Ken Carter"

"Channing Tatum — Jason Lyle"

"Antwon Tanner — Worm"

"Rick Gonzalez — Timo Cruz"

"Never does it die; it starts again, and again. It's in your hands."